Have you ever gotten so tired to want to live.

[Phantom Shadow]

I made it thru the holidays, I can't tell you how. Was so close so many times to just ending it or wanting too. My Therapist and my Psy doctor both left the VA back in Sept and Oct. Still taking my med's but don't really want to any more. Yes I have Military PTSD but so many other factors make it where I am so tired of doing one day at a time. Waiting on new people to be hired at my usual VA clinic. Then I will have to start all over again. This is my fifth Therapist in five years so tired of starting over again: why should anyone keep it up?????????

 

[EveHarrington]

Hugs.

Do you have the option to go private? For more continuity of care?

 

[Deleted member 28403]

Do you have any local support community?

What kept you going to this point?

 

[Phantom Shadow]

O Thee that does not want to go on
Not strong enough to do it myself
another part to deal with

But why go on it the question
Don't thee really want to go on
Only because I do not want to punish the wife

Never good enough
nothing is done well enough
Even when I win I lose

So why go on
The kids are on there own
The wife can find another better Hubby

So why go on when you are not good enough
The VA does believe me
the black op's you did are not on the books

So the military and the VA say it never happened
But the 12 are still just as dead
There knive wounds are just as really now as then'

So why go on How do you prove it
Why try Just Die For what you were ordered to do
It is a sin so go on to HELL just die

 

[Deleted member 541]

Totally get how you feel. It’s depression talking. Can’t tell you how many therapist I’ve had since I was 15, I’m now 64. Yup, it’s hard and it sucks, but if you stick with this and really tear apart your trauma, triggers and emotions, it does get better.......

 

[Phantom Shadow]

Totally get how you feel. It’s depression talking. Can’t tell you how many therapist I’ve had sin...

Thank You. I have just turned 61 myself a couple weeks ago. Can't seem to win against the 6 weeks in 77