Have You Ever Moved To Be With Your Beloved?

[EveHarrington]

The problem with thinking this far in advance is that you end up putting a lot of unnecessary pressure on the relationship for it to be more than it actually is. You skip the casual getting to know you steps in name of the relationship being forevermore. It is NOT worth losing your familiar stomping ground where all of your support resides. I speak out of experience. Things ended far before a move was actually planned, and I am grateful for that. We are people who need a ton of support so decisions like this shouldn’t be taken lightly. You two only like the idea of one another, you don’t actually like one another for who the person actually is. Slow waaaaay down and meet one another, spend lots of time with one another, let the relationship naturally grow.

 

[Changing4Best]

This town has been going down hill for years. If a store is rebought, it ends up dying too. A restaurant just opened a couple of months ago and is already closed forever. I (as an individual) can only do so much. I am doing what I can. Even the next town over is not dying, just this one. 12 miles from here is a booming town! It has a BIG BOX STORE, a nice Main St. and lots of Dr.s and the like that I go to now. The ONE thing it has that I do not like is that the transportation system is not as good for me as this town's one is in which I reside. I don't own a car, so you see, Transit is essential for me. Transit in the town 3 hours from here is no better than the one 12 miles from here either. So, in my waking daytime hours, I can think straight. At 2 AM, well, er.... my mind does weird things. (That is the time I started this thread).

 

[Friday]

If you need an excuse to leave the place you’re living? Using people for that is common, but IMO it’s better to use a job. Less of a chance of hanging the moon on a job, and not seeing it for what it really is; jobs rarely mind being used; and far fewer hassles should you decide to quit that job and find a better one in the new place.

As to the OP... I don’t think I’ve ever moved somewhere for someone (if we don’t include my dad, I moved as often as every 6 months to follow him around)... but I’ve often stopped my travels for a time to stay with someone I found somewhere. :D Stopping my travels for someone for longer than a few days to make the acquaintance well enough to return, or few weeks vacation, is kind of a big deal. The longest I’ve stayed anywhere of my own accord was 3 or 4 years. Then I would have left again, but legalities made it ...problematic... to leave. 2 more years, though, I’m free as a bird again.

I know I view moving differently than most people, it’s not a major decision or hardship for me.

Which is why I’m always baffled by people for whom it IS a big deal using a mediocre relationship as an excuse to move, when they already want to. Why not just move??? And then find an amazing relationship where you land?

IDFK.

 

[Changing4Best]

I move quite often too. So I can relate. I have had many reasons for which I moved when I did. I guess this one was just a convenient one at the moment in which it occurred to me that it might be nice to move once again. I am just tired of this place and there has been no love here that I could really call love. There was one "glorified friendship" is about it. Anyway, to tell you the truth, @Friday, I am past due on a move. I guess I am getting itchy to do so.

 

[Changing4Best]

Ah, turns out that he lives in a ghost town too. So who knows. If things work out between us, maybe we could move to the town that is 15 miles from here that is NOT a ghost town. That is worth looking into!!! I would not lose my support network then, of course. And he said he is willing to move to anywhere I want to move to.

 

[blackemerald1]

I would not move for anyone except maybe my children.

Not having transport is a MAJOR problem @Changing4Best - be wary of this in any relationship or move.

Moving to a new location is isolating if you require supports. It takes time to re-establish all of that.

I too thought this was a very new romance. I must be confused... :sorry:

 

[Changing4Best]

Oh, it is. I was just looking much too far into the future, something I do way too much of! LOL....

 

[Changing4Best]

OK, he asked for money in a round about way. That is the end of that!