Have You Experienced Posttraumatic Growth?

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A friend sent me a link to an online article in Psychology Today dating from 13 January 2013 by psychologist Stephen Joseph. The article begins:

In the midst of a crisis the future can seem bleak. But there is hope. The new science of posttraumatic growth has shown that people report positive changes following even highly stressful events.

People often talk about how trauma has been transformational in their lives. Survivors often describe how their views on life and their priorities have changed, or how they have developed a new sense of who they are and what they are capable of, or how they feel closer and more loving toward other people and have found that their relationships have been taken to a deeper level.

Doesn't sound like this guy is talking about peeps with PTSD (or at least not me). But maybe people with PTSD after some therapy? Which made me wonder, do you have any experience of post traumatic growth, with our without therapy?

For me, since my Dx nearly seven months ago, and after decades of amnesia, I have the glimmer of a feeling that I'm finally going to discover who I really am—who I originally was—before multiple traumas rewired my life. Maybe a sliver of hope that my "blind spots" about life will become sighted again.

 

[wolfkitty]

I believe part of what he is saying is true, but it depends on where you are at in your growth.

For me I will never be the person I originally was before my multiple traumas, mainly because I was six years old and I am so far removed from who I was at six.

However, I believe that is a new "normal" waiting for me. A culmination of all I have become and learned during the trauma and I I have grown through and grown out of. I have met some pretty shallow people who amazingly enough had relatively trauma free lives. They don't seem to have the depth of compassion, understanding and sympathy that someone who has healed from a great trauma has.

I have even seen this in my own life. I will admit I was a bit of a snob about people who were homeless. Until I was homeless, while in the midst of going through cancer treatment at well. Well that was pretty traumatic for me but I have healed that one rather rapidly and now I have a lot more compassion and understanding of the people standing on the side of the road.

This is just my interpretation of what this man is saying. Oh one more note my original trauma has been much harder to heal and my forgiveness is still a process. However, I would like to believe that when I come out the other side I will have a greater depth than I have had before!

 

[MissMacD]

There are some parts of my trauma that have given me a whole new meaning to my life. I've come within inches of my life twice and I know that some day when I am ready and when my abuser finally dies I am going to write about it and possibly begin doing public speaking or go into research so that I can help to develop new methods for PTSD treatment.

 

[pamcoco]

Oh my yes!

In spite of still not being sure I will survive long, I wouldn't change a thing.

The foremost change is that my intuitive voice is much clearer. It comes more easily and loud, regardless of the convenience of its message.

I have lost mostly everyone in my life, leaving as they lecture me on my choice to be miserable. But, their intolerance and ignorance has made me own my own. As a result, I feel compassion deeply and fully, something I lacked before the tornado.

Because, I was incapable of being in any stimulus that triggered me, I left my abusive and shallow career as a costume designer and have my own business and am passionate about it. I never would have done this if I had an option, but ptsd gave me no option.

Through an existential crisis, in the wake of the assaults, I found a new form of faith, not based on judgement or punishment. I view faith as trust that all things, even ugly and painful. Since dark is as natural as light, it must be for the best. If I have to control the world and life to fit my perspective of success, then really I have no faith.

I see people for who they are, much, much more than I used to. I now believe the only way to truly love is in full knowledge of the sinner and saint within. This by far has been the toughest, but also the most essential lesson. I say this, alone in my house that is nearing foreclosure for the 5th time, ill without any way to get the medical treatment I need, with 10 dollars to my name and with pretty much everything in my life the opposite of what I had hoped and expected. But still I choose truth in solitude over the vacancy I used to call relationships. I have a handful of people remaining and they are like me, sometimes broken, sometimes hopeful, but always aware and grateful of every small blessing, all intimate with struggle.

I have come to terms with death and now it seems absurd how much I based my previous life on winning, as if we are getting out of this thing alive and the biggest 401k makes a difference. I find peace in the knowledge that all things return to the earth, and deterioration is as natural as birth. As I watch my body transform even as a part of disease, I am humbled by the beauty of the process.

Because I had to, I now reside in a world with as much darkness as light. It is beautiful at times and ugly at others. But I believe that it is only from this place that I can be of service. It is the denial of the shadow that perpetuates abuse, assault, rape, violence, etc. If one is unwilling to see it, then they cannot be of aid to those that most need help, prevent it whenever possible nor teach others how to live life safer and kinder.

There is my long list about my growth from ptsd. I actually could go on for much longer but will spare you ;-)

 

[5150angel]

Pamcoco, Wow! I believe your post is the most profound and beautifully delivered perspective and that I have ever read. Thank you!

 

[arfie]

I have mused privately that the "D" in my own PTSD stands for "Delay." For a very long list of reasons I delayed processing the emotional stresses of a great many traumas and developed a strong habit of emotional procrastination. Once I drop the resistance and allow the processing to happen, I find myself experiencing growth and shifting priorities very similar to what your article describes. I may even start calling it, "Post Traumatic Stress Growth" PTSG? However delayed, it is never too late to grow.

Strictly personal musings, by the way. This would be my first time communicating these unaccredited thoughts.

 

[The Albatross]

Yes I think I have a bit of "post traumatic growth". I like the way Arfie described it as my own view is similar.

 

[gone]

These are wonderful, beautiful insights. Thanks so much for sharing.

I would like to believe that when I come out the other side I will have a greater depth than I have had before!

@wolfkitty That's what I hope too!

I've come within inches of my life twice and I know that some day when I am ready and when my abuser finally dies I am going to write about it and possibly begin doing public speaking or go into research so that I can help to develop new methods for PTSD treatment.

@MissMacD I too feel a strong call to try and help others (when I'm able), whether young people in the midst of trauma, or older people reeling from rediscovery of forgotten traumas. Hope I'll have the strength/stability to do that at some point.

Because I had to, I now reside in a world with as much darkness as light. It is beautiful at times and ugly at others. But I believe that it is only from this place that I can be of service. It is the denial of the shadow that perpetuates abuse, assault, rape, violence, etc. If one is unwilling to see it, then they cannot be of aid to those that most need help, prevent it whenever possible nor teach others how to live life safer and kinder.

@pamcoco It really sounds to me like you've reached (are reaching?) a true state of transcendence. Thank you for shining your light on us.

I agree too with the general remarks about increased levels of compassion. My first traumas date back to infancy, so I'll never know who I "originally" was, but I know I've always been compassionate and empathetic for all living things, enough so that life hurts a lot at times for pain that isn't mine. I've always considered this something of a strength, but am just now beginning to realize—because of what several of you have said here—that this might be a "gift" from trauma, maybe an example of my own posttraumatic growth.

So thank you, your stories of growth have inspired me much today.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Really, has anyone here NOT grown after their trauma? I guess it rubs me the wrong way because I see it as "look at how your trauma has made you a better person!" Uhm, not so much. I don't see this as novel, profound, or groundbreaking, rather stating the obvious and wrapping it in a shiny bow. We ALL have grown because of our traumas, in one way or another, from those freshly diagnosed and perhaps still in a bit of shock to those who are symptom free.

 

[DMerish]

Here is the link to the article, which defines what the author termed "Post Traumatic Growth": [DLMURL]http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/what-doesnt-kill-us/201301/have-you-experienced-posttraumatic-growth[/DLMURL]

 

[gone]

Hey, thanks, @DMerish. Do you know why I couldn't post the URL, or embed a link?

 

[The Albatross]

Hmmm. Nothing shuts down a potentially inspirational thread like a bunch of snark. Hold on to that glimmer Amne. The idea of post traumatic growth really helped me.