Healthy Relationships

[Lady of Longbourn]

My relationship is ending and I have been thinking and making lists of the things I have learned from it. What are some things that belong in healthy relationships?

 

[Deleted member 28740]

An elderly couple I know will celebrate their 70th anniversary in June. I asked the same thing - almost in tandem, pick your battles carefully. All the good can be there, but if you do not know when to let it ride out, holding the good, letting the crap slide out, it is war.

 

[Deleted member 28740]

To my above reply. V&J not only tolerate each other, they love each other. He likes spicy food, she does not, she likes sweet, he does not. He does the laundry, and cooking, she is cheerful and keeps their ship afloat. He is also very positive in nature, resilient. A balance. Opposites in some obvious ways, but very similar on core - they love each other and the differences are a gift of compromise.

 

[Deleted member 28812]

Wow! Great question! I really do like your question :) and will be interested in the answers.

 

[anonymous]

Communication.
Honesty.
Trust.
Respect.
Acceptance.

 

[Recovery4Me]

@Ayesha I see your maturity & loving kindness in facing forward. :hug:

However, I wish to offer heartfelt expression of recognition of what is dancing between the lines.:hug: I am truly sorry.

The odd thing is, that the love which one carries will come with us into any type of relationship. You have a golden and kind heart. That is all that you will need. I dare say in time...that is what he will miss the most. Prayers offered and PM anytime. Thank you for all that you give to us on the board.

 

[intothelight]

Personally, I think relationships are as healthy as the people that are in them. To be your best self for your partner and they in turn to do the same with you. There are times we treat complete strangers better than our spouses and don't put a enough time in effort what is the most important relationship in our lives. A good sense of humor helps too.

 

[illusionist]

All of what has been said and laughter....lots of it.
You beat me to it intothelight.

 

[hodge]

What Anonymous said. Trust. Good communication -- all the better with a little humor mixed in when appropriate. Trust. Love, of course. Respect for each other. Having the same values. Trust. And choosing the battles. 99% of the time it's not worth bringing up some minor irritation. You probably do something she or he would be mildly irritated with, too. But don't sweat the small stuff. Learn to overlook it. And do listen to each other and take care of each other.

 

[illusionist]

Taking the time to reflect on your relationship and to say "thank you, for being you"......sounds corny but it's important, I think, to take note and voice appreciation of that special person in your life.

 

[Nam]

I might have to disagree with the overlooking the small stuff. I'm a firm believer in communicating everything, good, bad, little, big, and everything in between. If something doesn't feel right, discuss it right then. Same goes the other way, if it feels really good, say that too.

 

[anonymous]

I think that overlooking the small stuff is more along the lines of not picking a fight because you want the toilet paper roll to be "under" while your partner prefers "over".....and little inconsequential things like that. I mean what is the point of arguing the little stupid things, or even bringing them up in conversation? It just creates unnecessary conflict. Don't sweat the small things in life. If you constantly pick on the little things, it will likely drive your partner nuts!