Hello:)

[HopingForPeace]

Hi,

I just came upon this site when searching for a PTSD Support Group and I'm glad that I did:)

I am trying to learn what I can about PTSD and how it may relate to what my fiancee is going through.

He's had problems with depression and anger/moodiness since I've known him (from a stressful childhood, I believe). He has gone dramatically downhill over the last couple of years, since we relocated to a bigger city and he experienced a series of events that I would call "stressful", but he calls "traumatic"... I guess everyone's perception is a bit different.

I was starting to be afraid that he was becoming (or was already) mentally ill, but after researching PTSD more, a lot of the symptoms seem to fit, and now I'm feeling horrible for not taking his concerns more seriously:(

It had been my understanding that PTSD was limited to major traumatic events, but now I am seeing a lot of information on it also being linked with long-term constant stress, including stress caused by harassment, etc. The thing that really seems to have set him off is some racial harassment at the college he was going to. He had this jerk in his classes for 3 semesters in a row, and when the third semester started off with him making a racial slur at him in front of other students, he lost it. He dropped out of all his classes and won't go anywhere near the school anymore, even to file a complaint.

He's also become very suspicious of people of the jerk's race (white) and has pretty much isolated himself at home, since we live in a predominantly white area (I'm white, too:() He's afraid of everyone, and doesn't even trust me much right now.

He also said he is having "flashbacks" to the episodes of harassment, and is hardly sleeping at night, depressed a lot of the time, physically sick a lot, very irritable, gets triggered by something. Then starts thinking about all the stuff that's gone wrong in his life... and unfortunately blames me for it:( He's also referred to having an "identity crisis".

I'm not sure if it maybe is some kind of PTSD, or if its something else, but I thought I would start with finding out as much as I can, and if his symptoms do maybe fit.

Thanks:)

 

[goingonhope]

Hi & Welcome to this Forum HopingForPeace,

Yes, you can learn a lot about: (What is Ptsd?) , here upon the forum, so I hope you feel free to read much. Check out the Wiki pages too, ...and the articles, and so much more.

As far as the symptoms you described though regarding your fiancee, so far they, and from my limited point of view, could match up with nothing more then lifetime, or long-lived resentments.

Chronic resentments may get restimulated in anyone holding them, and felt just as if the original hurts are being emotionally refelt (and all people carrying resentments have coping mechinism patterns in order to attempt to cope with such, and in attempts to cope with the negative emotions restimulated and brought back and/or given energy/life).

Though this is what I've experienced, as well as, observed time and again in life, many people with (alive & well) resentments do not have Ptsd. And, yet resentments do affect people symptomatically, sometimes in look-alike ways, as of what you described with your fiancee.

Anyhow, HopingForPeace, I hope you find peace.

Unlikely you will find any peace reading about others trauma here, but you may find some information and more, while reading the wealth of articles and pages upon What is Ptsd. IMO, you've found a good source to do just that.

Still personally, I think it is just as valuable for you to delve some into reading what precisely is resentment, and how does chronic resentments affect one in a variety of symptomatic ways.

Just my thoughts here, and wishing you and your fiance answers and wellness.

goingonhope