Help!! Having flashbacks, so scared

Smile

MyPTSD Pro
Yes but sounds like an “advanced flashback” with memory loss. There isn’t anything to be frightened about. Just know that over the course of time you will see more snd more parts of the flashback when you are ready. When your eyes was it “voluntary” or done “involuntarily”?
Involuntary. And thanks for the info
 

Widow_of_one

MyPTSD Pro
Involuntary. And thanks for the info
Involuntary is great news because you are entering the final stages of the “flashback process”. I am also at this stage where your body will move involuntarily thereby releasing “the negative emotional charge” attached to the original trauma!
 

TruthSeeker

MyPTSD Pro
I thought I’ve had flashbacks before but what I’ve experienced over past few days… this is NEW & scary as all hell :(

No strength to go into details (not sure it’s necessary anyway?).

Just looking for help/advice/ANYTHING that’s helped you regulate after flashback is over. I have no control over it happening but I’m having such a hard time coming fully back to the present & not being petrified.

Thanks & hope your all doing well :)
Sorry @Smile for taking so long to answer. Here are my go-to's for flashbacks.....breathe slowly, eat something you really love or that smells pungent...like peppermint candy....that always helps me, the flavor of peppermint can be grounding; sing loudly to music while walking, take a cold or cool shower and take your time.....the cold is a distractor and refocuses you to a different kind of discomfort, watch a funny show, light comedy, or a favorite show, swim laps with or without flippers, kayak against the current or paddle like you are racing, if in a tidal area...come back with the current....and paddle to the beat of the music which helps me keep going.....this helps me tremendously with flashbacks and looping, or some other activity that will divert your attention and wear you out, refocus your attention (like a cold shower) or make you laugh or feel differently-more positive.

I started creating "feel" memories to pull back from. I started going hiking and finding cold waterfalls to walk in and "feel" the water. And "feel" the cold water run over me, splash over me, and hit my face. So, if I recognize or someone else recognizes me dissociating or having a flashback they place ice or cold water on my skin and help me "come back". Today it rained and I just let it hit me. It feels so good to "feel" things in nature around me because they are real and present. Worth a shot maybe.
Nature photography is very grounding because I feel the grace and beauty in nature, and because photography requires one to focus all of their attention on one thing....to capture a wildlife photograph.
 

Friday

Moderator
a horrible & scary traumatic memory.
I wasn’t HERE or PRESENT.

My shorthand

Remembered = Memory // Intrusive Thoughts
Relived = Flashback


Now… I can zone out & get locked in memories for days. 99:100 I strongly prefer flashbacks, because I’m able to be a helluva lot more functional, as the fully immersive -or worse, fully immersive and moving- tend to be wicked fast. Single sense flashbacks, like screaming pain, or smelling death (my past 16 hours), or hearing air moving that isn’t moving, have legs. But the more the world is erased? Rather than slotting neatly into the world? The faster my brain calls halt. Memories/intrusive thoughts, on the other hand, can knock my legs out from underneath me and allow zero interaction with the world… for very, very long periods of time.

From what you describe? It could have been either intrusive thoughts, or a flashback, or both. Which also happens. When even a millisecond worth of flashback kicks into even days worth can’t-stop-thinking/feeling.

Why I bother to shorthand remembered vs relived? Most kinds of Grounding helps me come back from flashbacks, but just kicks me even harder into intrusive thoughts & memories. So parsing whether I’m remembering or reliving something ends up being a pretty durn vital task for me.

For my own self, my eyes closing means it’s almost always intrusive thoughts/memories. As they’re too immensely overwhelming. Meanwhile my flashbacks happen as I go about my day, because the past and present is actually taking up the same space.
 
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Widow_of_one

MyPTSD Pro
My shorthand

Remembered = Memory // Intrusive Thoughts
Relived = Flashback


Now… I can zone out & get locked in memories for days. 99:100 I strongly prefer flashbacks, because I’m able to be a helluva lot more functional, as the fully immersive -or worse, fully immersive and moving- tend to be wicked fast. Single sense flashbacks, like screaming pain, or smelling death (my past 16 hours), or hearing air moving that isn’t moving, have legs. But the more the world is erased? Rather than slotting neatly into the world? The faster my brain calls halt. Memories/intrusive thoughts, on the other hand, can knock my legs out from underneath me and allow zero interaction with the world… for very, very long periods of time.

From what you describe? It could have been either intrusive thoughts, or a flashback, or both. Which also happens. When even a millisecond worth of flashback kicks into even days worth can’t-stop-thinking/feeling.

Why I bother to shorthand remembered vs relived? Most kinds of Grounding helps me come back from flashbacks, but just kicks me even harder into intrusive thoughts & memories. So parsing whether I’m remembering or reliving something ends up being a pretty durn vital task for me.

For my own self, my eyes closing means it’s almost always intrusive thoughts/memories. As they’re too immensely overwhelming. Meanwhile my flashbacks happen as I go about my day, because the past and present is actually taking up the same space.
As I’ve read your post it sounded a lot of what I am going though. I work as a live-in aide so I have a lot of quiet time to connect with my body and I can feel at a very low volume what they did to me as a kid in terms of abuse.
please explain the top part of your post:

Remebered = memory?
Intrusive thoughts relived = flashback?
 
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