Help Me Understand The Professional Mentality Of Therapists

[Aaa]

OK, so I've talked to nearly 20 therapists and met a handful of them.

I detailed them my life...

As a former therapist u bring up some important pts. It would take too long to fully explain but I can say the following. Those of us who went thru an excellent program learned about and know how to basically implement EBT (evidence based therapies). This is newer in the field so very long term therapists likely don't utilize these approaches based in the evidence. 2- therapists do have a LOT of standards. More than most professions so u r mistaken about that. 3- there r a lot of requirements for licensing including many hours of supervision with a licensed therapist. -4- it's takes a long time to be good at this craft. More than u know and if u have seen a lot of younger there's it's that does play into this. However I wish to or out that there r a lot of bad doctors and even worse attorneys. All require licensing but nowhere is it more intense than therapist. 5- u wouldn't want to be treated like a cookie cutter and EBT don't ALWYS work due to the uniqueness of ppl. 6- as to telling u what to do. In this culture it is strictly forbidden to do that. U can't take responsibility for others. That is not ur deal. And we would be taking away your own personal agency. That doesn't help u. U must take action yourself. Otherwise we would be fixing your problems while u become dependent. 7- yes soem therapy takes a very long time. Much longer than u think but if it's not a huge matter then it should be relatively brief and it is. A lot of it is dictated to us via insurance. They tell us how to practice but they also tell doctors and other health professionals too. 8- there is a limit. It's called the tarasoff ruling. Look it up. 9- imminent danger is a assessment made by an individual. We can't assume 10- normally a detailed assessment as u say IS DONE. Any reputable one nowadays will but u have to remember that there r old hands too who don't. 11- we cannot inject our value system into you. That is your life. It's hard to learn that. It's there in the room but u have to stay out of your life. 12- as to therapeutic relationship. Most of the healing that occurs is really that. U have decide to take action in order to make things better. We can help with specific actions but it is you that must learn or u wouldn't be coming to us. In a patriarchal and or collectivist iv culture u may have therapists that direct and tell but that isn't in the US. 13- it's important to have a non judgmental ear for this work. It is not for the therapist to tell others how to live their lives. That's not therapy

 

[Tom S. in Tn.]

This discussion showed up as a link in my EMail and despite being over a month old, I can not resist commenting.
Having seen close to 40 of these people in my life, I can relate to the self perpetrating loop the writer finds their self in, since it's always the client who must work harder toward success and will always be their fault when it fails........ despite untrained practitioners ego gratification covering their inadequacies.

This industry desperately needs third party oversight. Anyone practicing at any level in the mental health industry, from unlicensed church 'family and couples counselors' to board cert'd Psychiatrists should have a complete psychological evaluation with psychiatric screening as part of the licensing and renewal process. And any individual caught practicing, especially those billing govt. and private insurance for reimbursement without an active license in good standing within their board of registry's jurisdiction should be jailed and fined to the extent of the law as a perp impersonating as a MD or law enforcement officer.

Let me raise a question or 2 here: Who tracks sexual misconduct that is allowed discovered in the counseling industry, if any, outside licensing or the industry itself?
Where does one of these victims seek mental health help??

Despite 2 pages of commentary, I see the writers perspective clearly, as well as the people within the industry unable to confront self policed poor standards and only able to gaslight the victim as problematic. (I personally have to question motives of those who try hardest to show how safe this industry is)

Victims in mental distress are in no position to fight and advocate for their well being as much as any individual in medical distress or compromise. What would happen if your family MD closed the door to their private office and tried every week to get in your pants? Not at all unlike a doctors office with nurses and assistants, counseling should involve many people and especially during delicate and intimate treatment.

Hope I'm not too far off topic, but this industry is in desperate need of outside third party oversight; Tom S. in Tn.

 

[anonymous]

I have a deep fear of therapists and doctors. One of my childhood abusers was a doctor, and as an adult, I was raped by someone in the therapy profession.

Most therapists drive me nuts. They try to use their degrees to think they know best and tell me what to do with my life. It didn't help me or my symptoms.

I knew I needed to talk to someone and work through it all... so I had to first start with group therapy. I could handle peers. I got a TON out of group therapy, and eventually, I was able to find a therapist would frankly refused to tell me what to do with my life, even when I wanted her too, and instead helped me work through the trauma and help me make my own decisions for my own life. She pretty much meets most of the criteria you have.

Finding a therapist is tough, and I would be burnt out too after 20 therapists. I hope you get some reprieve and the job search goes well.

If/when you are ready to try again to find a therapist, perhaps consider DBT, Trauma focused CBT, expressive (art and etc) or process trauma therapy group by a well trained trauma therapist who runs a well structured group.

 

[Classicrocker]

If this is what the therapist's job is, then maybe the job of therapy needs to change. I'm sorr...

Wow... Guess I'm lucky , took me only 2 therapists before I found the correct one for me.. There are defenetly some questionable therapists out there, but what exactly are you looking for? To me, having PTSD, anxiety and depression, I have a therapist that listens to what I tell her and offers suggestions to whatever we're talking about. I see her every week and know she listens B/C if I said something IDK, say a month ago, if I bring it up again she fills in the blanks when I lose my train of thought which happens frequently to me. She also runs a 9/11 group and when I start talking, once again, when I forget, what I'm saying, she puts me back on track... Bottom line, isn't the basic job of a therapist is to listen, show interest, compassion and make suggestions? I've been seeing her for about 5 years on a weekly basis, and she's always been just a phone call away. If not for her and my Psychiatrist doubt I'd be alive today. They may very well be listening even if you're convinced otherwise.

 

[Friday]

If a person don't trust his/her therapist, how is the person willing to share his/her deepest thoughts and feelings?

I haven't replied to this thread, because most of what the OP is looking for in a therapist is the exact opposite of what I need/want in a therapist. That said?

There used to be a regular poster on here who would say "Trust the process, not the person."

That's what a lot of people need... It would either take far too long to build trust, or the time was too limited, or trust is just -quite frankly- not what needed to be worked on right now, but A-Z? Reeeeally is! Like yesterday.

 

[anthony]

who would say "Trust the process, not the person."

IMHO, that is the most valid point of therapy. Trust can take years to truly build... and the question I would always say to ask yourself is, "do you want to keep delaying this for years, just to see whether you trust your therapist?"