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Help! Opened Up To A Friend And They've Shut Me Out!

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I'm kinda with cherryblossom on this one, though I've just noticed that you have already resolved this some, but I will add my two cents anyway...

Your friend has a right to her healthy boundaries, and something may have been going on for her that you didn't know about, which made it hard for her to hear what you were sharing. At least she was honest with you. That's the sign of a good friend, not someone who is abandoning you. I'm sure it was unpleasant to open up like that only to hear that she couldn't take it, but that is how things go sometimes.

I have a friend who is the sort of person everyone goes to with their problems. He reminds me of me when I was younger actually. Recently, he had a friend open up to him and share the most horrific childhood atrocities with him, and my poor friend wanted to run and hide and it took him about a week to replenish the energy that was depleted from this man spending the entire day unloading his childhood trauma onto him. My friend didn't lay down healthy boundaries with him. He didn't also think of his own welfare, and paid the price.

This is hard stuff for you to have experienced and processed, and very risky to share with others, but there does need to be some understanding for how it can also affect the person on the other end listening. I know you said that you did, so I'm sure you know all that.

It made me remember when I had to put up a boundary with a woman I thought was a friend last year. She was always calling me up and sharing her feelings and problems with me, and I was ok with that to a certain degree, until she one day sent me a text message at 7a.m telling me she didn't want to be on the planet anymore!

I woke up to this message and was fretful all day for her, as she wouldn't answer her phone. I was in tears and so worried about her. Later that evening, I saw her and shared how that experience affected me. She looked at me like I was an idiot and said she was over it!!

After another incident of her sharing stuff at inappropriate times, with no understanding of personal boundaries, I was forced to erect some firm boundaries with her...which she didn't like at all and abused the hell out of me for it...for asking her to not send suicidal messages at that early hour if she knew it was a passing feeling and had no intention of acting on it.

My point is that people have a right to give what they can and to also choose when they are not able to give, and it can be distressing for someone who chooses to open up to them. It doesn't mean your friend doesn't care about you though...she's just taking care of herself as well...which she is entitled to do.
 
@SwordsMistress
This is my first post here, so please be patient with me.
Something you said in one of your replies really resonated and I wanted to comment on it:
That is sadly how I think of it. My therapist has told me the same thing but it is so difficult to think otherwise. The abuse has made me who I am today and I hate him for it. The problem is I have an issue with differentiating myself from that if that makes any sense? Like PTSD and my abuse has literally taken over my life.
I'm dealing with the same question in therapy right now, asking myself and my T, "Where does this abuse end and where do I begin?" I am of the rather contrary opinion that yes, the abuse does make you and shape you (otherwise, why would we all be on this forum?), but that ultimately, it's okay. It's okay to be hurting a lot and afraid. It's okay to let a bad experience change and shape you; the sooner you can accept and embrace it, the sooner you can open up and allow those positive experiences back in to shape you as well, and become more balanced and whole. We are all the dark and the light; sometimes the dark just gets a little too heavy.
You are certainly not alone in struggling with finding a sense of self in the aftermath of abuse.
 
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