Relationship How Do You Cope With Ptsd In Your Relationship?

[AllyB]

I'm new here but in serious need of support. I'm 23 years old dating a 25 year old with ptsd. My boyfriend and I fell in love fast, it only took 2 months. We've been dating a little over a year now and I've known about the ptsd for about 7 months.

I can't tell you how many times I've ended a conversation with him frustrated, hurt, or upset because of the ptsd. It seems like for all the happy times, there are just as many sad times. I often find myself feeling helpless, sad, even depressed at times. It's so hard to see the man you love with all your heart suffering so much. To top it off, I'm the type of person that doesn't try to burden others with my own problems, because I usually can just figure things out on my own, but this seems too big for me alone.

How do you cope with being in a relationship with someone who has ptsd? Do you see a therapist to help?

Thanks for your advice everyone. I had no idea I'd be in such a complicated relationship at 23...but it's comforting to know I'm not alone in this.

 

[LizardViolet]

How do you cope with being in a relationship with someone with ptsd?

- Educate yourself about ptsd. Read around the forum. Read a book or two. There are quite a few suggested here.
- Do your best not to take things personally when he does things that hurt you.
- Be patient with him
- Go see a therapist if you feel you need to. (I am a supporter and I have a therapist who has experience with trauma survivors.)
- Don't put up with too much crap from him. You'll see people talk here about walking on eggshells, but you don't want to go so far in that direction that everything revolves around him and you put up with abuse.
- Don't neglect your own needs, for friends other than him, for education, for fulfilling work, for things that you enjoy

You don't say whether he is seeking treatment. It is possible to heal but it can be a long road and the sufferer has to make the decision to start down that road him or herself. All you can do is offer support and encouragement.