Poll How Do You Cry?

[CafeAulait]

I'm good about crying.......does that sound right? I'm an emotional person. I don't hold back my tears. I let them flow as they may. I am crying now as I go thru these polls and realize more and more about PTSD.

 

[naturalfirebrand]

I Envy Those That Can Cry

I learned when I was a child that crying was just a way to bring negative responses. "Cry and I will give you something to cry about". I turned that part off as self defence.

I also cannot be tickled. The phrase 'tickle torture' comes to mind. I have asthma and it would continue until I literally could not breathe.

I have been trying a variety of meds to help my CPTSD. The biggest change I have seen is for the last four days I have cried more than in the last 4 decades. I think this is a good thing but I cannot say it for sure.

I saw my therepist 2 days ago and cried for most of the hour, a major change in my ability to control how I come across.

Linda

 

[Fennel]

I only cry in private. I don't like to cry in public because it often leads to people assuming that I am crying about my visible disability, which is very rarely the case. When I can't hold it, I try to go to a private area to let out the cry before going back out in public.

Fennel

 

[cat]

Naturalfirebrand - I too envy those who can cry & show their emotions. I had similar things said to me by my mum about crying 'tears don't wash with me so just stop it' 'wait until your dad gets home, then you'll have something to cry about' - thankfully dad just talked to me. All I needed from her was a cuddle & the opportunity to express my feelings.

In the last few weeks my psychologist has added 'C' to my PTSD which was a shock but at least I know that I haven't been imagining how I feel for the last 50yrs. Now I can work with her to understand & accept how I my childhood is underpinning my last trauma. My biggest challenge will be to cry & accept comfort from others without panicking.

 

[Earthmom]

When I talk about my husband, I tend to cry at the drop of a hat; at other times, with and for my kids, I can't seem to cry at all.

 

[Artista]

Depends on the circumstances. I can show emotions. Not always, but I do. When I relate trauma info it depends. I usually shut down. I get really non emotive as a protective response. Can't look at anyone when I say it either. Hard for me to breakdown in front of others.

 

[disconnect]

Always silently, even if I'm crying really, really hard, it's always silent.

 

[Cynthiatoo]

It depends. In the past 6-9 months I actually take myself off into the bathtub to have a cry because I know I will feel better for it. If I am unwell I have started to make myself do a bit of a quiet wail which is very effective in releasing stress and provides an immediate reduction in symptoms. I try to view it clinically. I have a nursing background. Crying used to mean something terrible, I have chosen to change this view.

 

[NIKI]

As a child I learned to cry making no sound at all...tears pouring down my face but no sound. If my father heard me crying (my main abuser) he would kick my bedroom door in and tell me he would really give me something to cry about. I believed him, he would have! So there I was alone crying without making a sound.

 

[NIKI]

I still do it to this day. It amazes my husband that some days when I am having a hard day with PTSD, he sees the agony I am in and crying my heart out without making a sound. He also tells my to let it out, that it is ok to cry now, he says scream if you want to!

 

[Deleted member 5760]

I only ever let the whole Niagara Falls thing happen if I'm alone. In front of someone else it's like a whimper. I'll literally whisper from behind my hand 'sorry, I just need a moment', then compose myself.

It's like I'm accepting a Grammy or something --- 'I told myself I wasn't gonna cry, but....'

 

[Cthulhu]

I lost the ability to cry a couple of years ago. It had been dying slowly since I was 12 or so.
It happened while the remaining emotional part of myself died. Well, maybe it did not die but only split up, it feels the same.

I can induce crying with some special moviescenes or songs... But that doesn't feel real, those are not my own emotions, they are only artificially induced. Artificially induced crying doesn't help for anything.