Death How To Help Someone Recover From The Loss Of A Loved One...

[anonymous]

A couple years ago, a close friend of mine lost their life partner. They found them dead one day, and although they seem to be dealing with it okay, I need to know how to be a positive support and comfort to my friend.

When they cry over their loss my heart breaks for them and I cry with them, but that doesn't seem to be very helpful.

I have never been in that situation but, I do understand what it is like to feel helpless and/or hopeless, I just don't know what to say or do to be a strong comfort for my friend.

Any suggestions would be most welcome!

 

[scout86]

I'd say allowing them to cry is a big thing. Allowing them to talk about the loss and the person they lost is a big thing too.

 

[RussH]

As you know grief is a process. The best thing you can do is be a friend who supports them as they work through the grief.

It takes time to heal, and being there during that process is a huge help.

 

[EveHarrington]

Simply be there for them.

 

[DharmaGirl]

I was a nurse, and sometimes I'd cry with patients and it helped them. I would also pray with them and just listen.

 

[DyAnne]

I lost my grandmother a week ago at age 91. She was fighting alsheimers anddementia for years. She went in her sleep

 

[Ronin]

I'm sorry for your loss, @DyAnne.

 

[illusionist]

Allow them to have the freedom to cry....and silently be relieved for them. No words are needed, body language says all that needs to be said, in my experience.

 

[Blondewitch32]

It is hard. I lost my partner of 7 years back in September from a huge heart attack. I went down to the car to check on him n thats when I found him. Everyone grieves differently. Your friend will have good and bad days but the pain and the emptiness will still be there. There's no time frame of grief. I would suggest you just be there for your friend. I had alot of support at first but then people have to get on with their own lives and family and jobs etc so they can't be there as much as they were in the first place. Let your friend know they will never be alone and although they are probably falling apart inside you have to try and keep their spirits up. Laugh with your friend at the memory's they have of them and their partner. Maybe do a memorial on each aniversary of their partners death so instead of mourning their passing your celebrating their life and having a positive day filled with laughter instead of tears.
Just carry on being an amazing friend and help your friend through it all no matter how long it takes.
Love and hugs to you both xx

 

[Freedomfighter]

Tough, just talking about it helps. Lost my nequew to suicide, look at his picture when he and my son played together, seeing my neviews smile, remembering him and not knowing what happened to him pains me still.