I don't know how to help anyone!!!

[Deleted member 33052]

Tex, you don't have to say anything! You just need to listen, and to care. That's it. As @Fadeaway said, if the decision has been made, nothing you say will make any difference. But knowing that you care might break through the barriers.

I've realized that when I'm dissociated and feeling like I don't care enough to keep fighting, the only thing that can bring me around is authentic human connection. Love. That's it. Thankfully, I keep finding it here.

 

[Ronin]

For a year, I've been so grateful for reading Britt's 'likes'. Not just on my posts, on everyone. Thinking of someone just reading through threads so carefully, thread by thread, poster by poster, and /caring/ enough to hit that 'like' button, show support, meant the world.

Some times, it's the small things.
Some times, it's just being online, showing up, still being well enough & still caring for the community enough to come back.

You don't have to know how to help; you already are.

 

[EveHarrington]

Tex I think you are very supportive. It makes me sad that you can't see the full extent of your worth here on the forum!

 

[DharmaGirl]

I saw someone write something like - I don't have the words, but I'm here and listening. I thought that was so supportive. I also think we pick something to fret about and it becomes huge for us when it's not for anyone else. I just did that with the like button. I thought if I didn't "like" everything I read, I might hurt someone's feelings and they wouldn't like me. It eventually went away, so I hope this will go away for you. From what I've read, you are supportive.

 

[lynsey]

Some years ago, someone I vaguely knew as a friend of my son's tried to hang himself. Thankfully his parents found him in time and there were no ill efffects, and as far as I know he is now happily married. But a while later I was in the local bar chatting with several of his friends and one of them mentioned the suicide attempt, saying 'What an idiot, if he felt like that why didn't he talk to us?' Curious, I asked 'What would you have said if he had?' and almost in unison they all said 'I'd have told him not to be so ****ing stupid'. Well, yes, I'm sure that would have helped a lot. That's why a forum like this can be so important. We'll probably never really know if something we say helped, but the fact that we take the trouble to say it shows we care and knowing someone cares could just tip the balance between someone giving up or not. So Texcat, whether you think you are getting it right or not, keep on trying.

Lynsaey