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ED I don't know if i should post this here

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Amy_Lisa

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I know this website is mainly for PTSD but I can't find anywhere online to talk about this. I have been fighting a horrible war with anorexia for almost 6 years. I had to drop out of school it was so bad. I was doing well at the end of last year/beginning of this year, but over the last month plus, I've been slipping back in. I'm not letting myself eat at times, feeling guilty and disgusted with myself when I do eat, and not liking my body again and thinking I'm fat. I'm trying to get control early this time so I don't go all the way back, but I'm still terrified that I could. I also just got cast in a play where the director has told people they need to lose weight, and the girl I got double cast with is much skinnier than I am. My grandmother also is still commenting on what I eat even though she knows about my ED. She even said not eating can help sometimes to look good. I don't know what I'm looking for with posting this, but I needed to say it somewhere
 
Eating disorders are truly awful, and recovery from them is really difficult but so worth it in the end, truly.
I really really recommend you to seek help from a therapist specialized in dealing with ED's. Depending on what level of care you need, you can do outpatient programs where you're followed by a team, including a therapist, psychiatrist, doctor, and nutritionist.

I used to be part of a forum a number of years ago I found very helpful called WhyEat (and no, despite the maybe weird "pro-ana" connotations with the name, it is not an insidious dieting forum or pro-eating disorder site) I found it when I was in the depths of my eating disorder and not seeking help at all, but through the other members I reached out and now I'm here years later out the other end. It is possible. I thought I was a hopeless case, but I'm living proof I was not.

best of luck to you in your recovery.
 
I agree with the others in that you need to seek help in real time from a doctor/therapist/nutritionist who deal with eating disorders.

Online forums and real time groups can also be helpful, but you really do need a team in place to support you through this. In terms of online support, you might want to take a look at Grace on the Moon. This is a pro-recovery website with a great deal of recovery amongst the core members and people with very large hearts.

For real time support groups in your area, you might check with our therapist or nutritionist as they run smaller groups on the side or know of smaller groups. Also, if you have a treatment center near you, they often offer groups for little or no cost. There are always 12 step groups such as ABA (Anorexic/Bulimic Anon), OA (Overeater's Anon (all varieties of eating disorders are supported), EDA (Eating Disorders Anon) that you can check out as well.

I hope the best for you and ask again that you please seek help in real time from your doctor and an ED therapist so that you can get the help and support you need. Take care. VB
 
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