I feel like i've lost my mind, what could be going on with me?

[hope4us]

I dont know if this is dissociation or what it is, but i feel like my mind is not with me, like i've completely lost it. i dont remember doing things that i just did 5 minutes ago, i cant hear as good as i usually can, i cant see as good as i usually can, i cant think straight, im messing up the words i try to say, i feel stupid when trying to have a conversation with people, i keep procrastinating everything, ive needed to pee and drink for an hour now but cant motivate myself to get up and do it, im misplacing stuff and dropping things without even noticing until later. anyone experience something similiar to this? why is this happening to me?

 

[Friday]

why is this happening to me?

You have PTSD?

 

[hope4us]

You have PTSD?

yes but i dont think those are ptsd symptoms. ptsd symptoms are avoidance, reexperiencing, negative thoughts, ects

 

[Sideways]

Dissociation. Often part of the avoidance bundle. Sometimes becomes big enough to become a thing seperate to, and in addition to, the standard ptsd symptoms.

Can you try something that will be soothing and help bring your mind back to the current situation you're in? A lot of people find that helps ease dissociative symptoms.

 

[hope4us]

Dissociation. Often part of the avoidance bundle. Sometimes becomes big enough to become a thing seperate to, and in addition to, the standard ptsd symptoms.

Can you try something that will be soothing and help bring your mind back to the current situation you're in? A lot of people find that helps ease dissociative symptoms.

i wondered if thats what it was, but i didnt feel like i was in a dream this time. theres been other time when i did feel like that, but i dont every time.

 

[Sideways]

Yeah, I've known I've had a dissociative disorder for years, but it plays out in so many different ways, depending on my stress levels and my situation.

Sometimes I get in a textbook derealization space. Other times I switch alters. Other times I just space out, the lights are on but no one's home.

So there's still times for me, years later, where it's like, "What the hell is this!?" Dissociation is a spectrum thing - may have been mentioned to you already, idk. So just like a kaleidoscope of colours, it can play out in all different ways.

Typically it's an avoidance thing. And sometimes it's as subtle as your brain switching down a few gears because of emotions it's trying to avoid, or stressors it's trying to avoid.

You freaked yourself out a bit with something floating in the bath, right? That's sounded totally me. I see something that doesn't instantly make sense, so my head goes in all horrible directions instantaneously, and it can be sickening.

The stress from that alone, when you have ptsd on board? Could definitely set off a dissociative "Brain is overloaded and can't cope" state. Something that made you cry because it impacted you so much, even though it was brief.

Our stress cups run very full. Stuff like that can easily tip us over into 'not coping' territory, avoiding life and stress and emotions and thoughts (or any combination of those) by dissociating. When we do that? The psycho-speak is 'avoidance'. 'Avoidance' symptoms being in the medical meaning of the word Avoidance, rather than the everyday meaning you and I ascribe to it.

 

[Lost23]

I can relate with everything you just said. I could have a 30 minute conversation with someone and then wonder what the heck we just talked about 30 minutes later. and trust me, the conversation was mostly them venting to me and me nodding my head in agreement. I feel very disconnected and like I've lost my identity completely! :( I feel numb

 

[hope4us]

Yeah, I've known I've had a dissociative disorder for years, but it plays out in so many different ways, depending on my stress levels and my situation.

Sometimes I get in a textbook derealization space. Other times I switch alters. Other times I just space out, the lights are on but no one's home.

So there's still times for me, years later, where it's like, "What the hell is this!?" Dissociation is a spectrum thing - may have been mentioned to you already, idk. So just like a kaleidoscope of colours, it can play out in all different ways.

Typically it's an avoidance thing. And sometimes it's as subtle as your brain switching down a few gears because of emotions it's trying to avoid, or stressors it's trying to avoid.

You freaked yourself out a bit with something floating in the bath, right? That's sounded totally me. I see something that doesn't instantly make sense, so my head goes in all horrible directions instantaneously, and it can be sickening.

The stress from that alone, when you have ptsd on board? Could definitely set off a dissociative "Brain is overloaded and can't cope" state. Something that made you cry because it impacted you so much, even though it was brief.

Our stress cups run very full. Stuff like that can easily tip us over into 'not coping' territory, avoiding life and stress and emotions and thoughts (or any combination of those) by dissociating. When we do that? The psycho-speak is 'avoidance'. 'Avoidance' symptoms being in the medical meaning of the word Avoidance, rather than the everyday meaning you and I ascribe to it.

do people normally notice it immediately when they are dissociating? cause im not sure if it was the bathtub incident that triggered it or if it was something that happened shortly afterwards. when i first started to notice i was dissociating was when my friend was talking about her boyfriend being a dick and a cheater, ( i have ptsd from past domestic violence). i kinda went emotionless and kept spacing out when trying to talk to her about it, than id say a few sentances like "yeah i know what its like, ive been through the same bullshit", and than id stare off into space again, and had to think about what i was going to say next. than she started talking to someone else about it, probably cause i was acting weird or i changed the subject. at first i just thought i was spacing out, but than i realized i was dissociating when my hearing and sight started to decrease, and i couldnt think straight, it was difficult to do anything, even communicating was hard. so im not sure if the conversation with my friend about jerk boyfriends may have triggered the dissociation or if it happened earlier during the bathtub incident and maybe i just didnt notice it right away? or maybe it was a combination of both things happening in a short period of time could have triggered it?

i also noticed that i became extremely exhausted when dissociating that time

I can relate with everything you just said. I could have a 30 minute conversation with someone and then wonder what the heck we just talked about 30 minutes later. and trust me, the conversation was mostly them venting to me and me nodding my head in agreement. I feel very disconnected and like I've lost my identity completely! :( I feel numb

do you feel like you cant see as good and cant hear as good when your dissociated? do you drop things without realizing it?

 

[Sideways]

do people normally notice it immediately when they are dissociating?

Definitely not at first. I think for almost everyone on this forum, the first time they even found out dissociation was a thing was after they were diagnosed with ptsd. Learning how to notice it's happening earlier and earlier in the process is a skill usually learned through therapy.

 

[hope4us]

Definitely not at first. I think for almost everyone on this forum, the first time they even found out dissociation was a thing was after they were diagnosed with ptsd. Learning how to notice it's happening earlier and earlier in the process is a skill usually learned through therapy.

i feel like i am dissociating more often lately. im not sure if thats because im coincidentally encountering triggers more often, or maybe im only thinking its happening more often because of the fact that im aware it happens now. if someone starts to dissociate more often then they use to does it mean that their mental health is getting worse?

 

[Sideways]

if someone starts to dissociate more often then they use to does it mean that their mental health is getting worse?

It's often a sign that the person is carrying around more stress. Have you spoken to your T about it?

 

[Teasel]

if someone starts to dissociate more often then they use to does it mean that their mental health is getting worse

I dont think it necessarily is, as @Sideways says it can defo happen because of more stress.