I Keep Cancelling My Annual Women's Wellness Exam

[SunflowerHoney]

Good evening all. Last July when I had my last pelvic and PAP I scheduled this year's exam for July again. However, something pretty traumatizing happened to me in April which has brought up a lot of things from my past. Since April I've experienced severe panic attacks and anxiety and discomfort around most people. I also keep rescheduling my annual pelvic exam a day or two before I'm due to go. I had to have a pelvic exam in June because of an early pregnancy miscarriage and went immediately into the Freeze part of Fight, Flight or Freeze. I have never had much anxiety or discomfort with pelvic exams beyond what is probably normal since they're just plain uncomfortable.

My appt is tomorrow afternoon and once again I'm getting the overwhelming urge to cancel it. Decided to post here as a delay tactic and also to see if any of you ladies can relate. Thanks in advance for reading my post.

--SunflowerHoney

 

[deer_in_headlights]

Good luck, good luck, good luck!!!

Do they know you have difficulty? Sometimes it backfires on women when they say they have PTSD, but if you tell them you were raped (if that's the truth), then they tend to treat you very, very gently and carefully, especially if you have a woman doing the exam. (I would find it extraordinarily difficult having a male do a pelvic, no matter how professional, understanding or compassionate.)

If you can try to have support systems in place, that helps, very much: I always set this up -alerting and being able to call or email your therapist the same day or evening, having good hotline numbers to call, coming here to post and chat... Doing lots of self-care and nurturing, treating yourself, making a list of resources to help you through will really help a lot.

I'm so sorry you had a miscarriage. I'm so sorry... There is a group called "Compassionate Friends" that usually has monthly meetings, where you can go for free to be nurtured by others who have lost children, at any age for any reason. They gather together to support each other through the grieving process. It's very comforting, healing, truly compassionate. They always welcome new people with open, welcoming arms. They frequently have grief experts come in to talk, to help in the grieving process. Please don't hesitate to find them.


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I hope that this pelvic exam will help you. Good luck! I'll be with you in love and spirit,
:hug: Deer

 

[SunflowerHoney]

Thank you @deer_in_headlights. I cancelled it right before I went to bed last night. :( But I had a back-up appt scheduled for next Wednesday, so at least I don't have to wait a whole lot longer. I will try your helpful suggestions.

My primary doctor doesn't know my history and she's always the one doing the exam. I've never had this kind of discomfort with her so I'll have to explain stuff to her and then she'll want me to take drugs and that means I'll have to have more appts for med checks. I have a hard time going to the grocery store and my physical therapy appts I need for a spine injury. I hardly ever leave the house. There's just so many things wrapped up with this one source of anxiety. Overwhelming. :(

But I will try even harder to go next week. It might be easier having your suggestions in mind, so thank you for those! And I really appreciate your kind words. The miscarriage is kind of a weird thing. I didn't even know I was pregnant. I was dealing with so much stress because of what happened in April that I wasn't paying attention to my body or my cycle. And I don't even want children. It was a strange and surreal grieving process.

 

[NoWhereKnowWhere]

Oh I know this one I'm 6 months overdue for a smear test although they only do them every 2 years in the uk. And I have a family history of cervical cancer :confused: I just can't force myself to go.

I probably should make an appointment but I'll just cancel it last minute like I always do. I think when I'm in a better place mentally it'll get done but not before.

It's a tough one. Mental health or physical health.