I Realize That I

[Deleted member 12723]

I realize that my daughter is an adult and I have unadressed issues with some of the things she is doing right now. I need to go slow and careful with her when I have a heart to heart with her.

 

[ms spock]

I realise I am very scared.

 

[The Albatross]

I realize that I will advocate for the client(s) under my care even if it is a problem for my managers. Had to navigate a tough situation, but could empathize and understand a legitimate concern by a tough client and now I'm afraid I'm going to get boned on my next schedule as it was clear that my managers were not happy about this. On the one hand I am satisfied with myself, because it is my role to expedite and assist a client. On the other hand I am rapidly increasing (sarcasm) in popularity with my management gals today (not the owner). What does this mean or say about me???? I have no idea what will happen next week and probably just f'ed myself (depending on how much they need me next week that is) - which is my own self interest, right? But I didn't hesitate to set aside my own stuff to do the "right thing" for a client with a legitimate concern/complaint.

This is why I get so confused about myself and why I change jobs fairly often.

 

[Britt.f7]

I realize it is going to take some adjustment to work with a new therapist after being with a different one for over a year.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I had the heart to heart with my daughter and I realize she is growing and learning from past patterns which makes me so very happy to know.

 

[ms spock]

On the one hand I am satisfied with myself, because it is my role to expedite and assist a client. On the other hand I am rapidly increasing (sarcasm) in popularity with my management gals today (not the owner). What does this mean or say about me???? I have no idea what will happen next week and probably just f'ed myself (depending on how much they need me next week that is) - which is my own self interest, right? But I didn't hesitate to set aside my own stuff to do the "right thing" for a client with a legitimate concern/complaint.

This is why I get so confused about myself and why I change jobs fairly often.

I relate to this struggle Alba. It is a tricky one.

The thing is to (I am guessing here) is to be true to your values and support the difficult client's legitimate concern, within appropriate boundaries and wear the flack from the people, which may or may not be as bad as you think it is. You can normalise this experience.

Unless someone has some type of personality disorder, most people appreciate knowing where they are with people. And people might be shitty for an hour or two or a week or two but it will pass. They may try to bully you but stand your ground politely.

Many people might argue with you but not lost respect with you. These are not your parents or your abusive ex's. These are work people who have other things in their lives and they will move on.

And to be honest they can't afford to lose someone like you so stand your ground, if they tell you how they feel, acknowledge that, if appropriate, and otherwise say "I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I didn't do a fair day's work for a fair day's pay and for me this was being a responsible and conscientious employee." Just repeat that as appropriate. "Part of care is to take in to view the whole person, this person is challenging and their concern was legitimate, so by taking that seriously and resolving/discussing it in a supportive manner I am hoping to reduce their anxiety so that they are not as anxious and difficult." Then you can say "You can think of an issue that grabs your heart? Hey? You know what it is like to be ignored about something that is important to you." Or some similar more appropriate script.

They will get over it - there may be blow back, there may not.

But hold your ground. Your course is steady. Your course is true Alba. Just don't be the first to blink.

The other thing is that you don't need to be right. Sometimes people get annoyed when someone handles a situation better than they do and because they have their own issues may feel humiliated or envious that they can't do what you can do. So they try to push you down because of their own emotions. Don't take it personally, just notice what they say and do and if appropriate let them save face.

You will be fine Alba. I have confidence in your abilities. Breathe, and remember this is round one of the repetitions. :rolleyes:;):geek::singing::smug::):happy:

And seriously how much of your time will they take up 10 minutes or part of a meeting if you go. Just breathe and go forth. You have disco beats sent to you from me today to tap your foot to. So tap your foot and think "ms spock is barracking for me!" Or some other humourous thought to get you through.

You could tell them you have a Star Trek friend who will be gunning for them, so they had better be afraid, very afraid as your Star Trek friend has connections all over the world and might send the Borg after them, or whatever is appropriate. (This doesn't work and is not funny for non Star Trek fans.)

And even if you did lose a couple of days or work because someone is a bit childish, they won't be able to sustain it. And personally I think you could do with a few days off.

 

[Ladyghosthunter]

I need to concentrate on my laywoman things and practicing Latin before anything else. Although I feel alone and sad today like I want to cry, I can't because I have other things I need to do. It's tough being alone and feeling alone when you have a long road ahead of you to not only get well but to make other people well.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I realize that I am becoming more sensitive to other people and to also be straight forward.

 

[Britt.f7]

I realize that I am not sitting in gloom as I was before. The darkness is now turning to light.

 

[The Albatross]

I am beginning to realize that with PTSD, having ADD isn't necessarily as big of a detriment as I thought it was. I can do more, be more if I'm interested provided I am consistent with self self care and manage the stress and triggers.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I realize that everyone is where they are at. If I suggest something, and they do not hear me, I no longer respond to them. I realize I can only speak to people that see and hear and accept me as I am.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I realize how fragile we all are in our heart of hearts. I realize that we share a common bond here, PTSD and that we are able to be there for each other and support and cheer each other on. We are so fragile and precious. We have survived so much and we are never again going to be the people we used to be but better off in spite of and no matter what.