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I Seem To Function The Best In The Worst Situations

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@Saelben , you know the process you use to learn all the things you know?
Learning to deal with the avalanche of PTSD is the same way.
You have learned things that I couldnt begin to comprehend. But if my life depended on knowing these things..I would let you teach me. And refer me to resources to extend that knowledge.
This is no different.
I read your posts and we all have the same experiances.
But we have had to learn how to handle ourself in those situations.
I know that these things take your brain in a different direction than what you are used to. Same with us.
We have to redirect our brain to learn how to breath ,of all things..ya..breathing.
Not to mention the the other stuff.
Like self regulation that was shared.
That is something you can learn. Ask your T. Read everything you can find on the subject.
Your brain might not get it the first time..you are asking it to go a different direction than what you are used to.
Hope this made sense.
Try it and see. You might have a breakthru of that awesome brain of yours
Taking it in a more healing direction.
 
@Saelben I think that only comes when you've pretty much worked through your trauma. I used to worry about everything, I was a drama queen too. My emotions were all over the freaking place. Something minor would send my into crisis, but the big shit, I dealt with fine, and then I'd crash.

Now, I'm really good with things. I still have the black and white thinking, but my emotions are pretty stable. I still get triggered, but I can recognize it and can step back. I can be the duck that lets water roll of my back. But, I can get pissed too. I just don't have the up and down as much as I used to. Pretty level now with emotions.
 
You are a stubborn little ass but I still love ya!:inlove:

So tell me how you made the shredder shaped like a guitar. Wish you would post a picture. I think this is so cool!
 
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@Saelben, I want to be more like @She Cat. For when I am hurt at whatever degree - I go into full on defensive and protective mode. No one, and I do mean no one protected me from the Hell on earth I was exposed to for freakin' decades; and I am now surviving with and through real time and life on life's terms. Trying so hard to remain present and not dissociate from self and life (good dissociation ie. books, movies, relationships (hard), etc.) Being in therapy now and here with y'all, I am hoping that I can lose the Defcon System of locked and loaded nuc armament that seems to grab me whenever I even seem to perceive imminent danger. It seems real to me. @Saelben, so looking forward to working hard this year in therapy and am trying to learn as @ladee shared - how to self-soothe, self-regulate, etc. So fond of your posts Saelben, because of your truth behind them which changes for us all day to day as we courageously try to face the monsters with all my tools in my toolkit, and fight these sons-of-bitches while having each other's backs here. I want so much to support and be of comfort here, and in doing so I am receiving far more than anyone here could ever imagine. Or can imagine because people here are giving and receiving same too!

By the way, I very much like your pseudonym Saelben. I was intrigued by it, looked it up. This name you chose has to do with the Lord Of The Rings, I believe. I make jewelry, plus everyone calls me Jade or I have notta to do with them. So everyone calls me Jade - has been this way for decades, even on wall plaques, etc. Ramblin man (woman) LOL, right now. cuddle hugs (innocent) for Saelben. JJ
 
@JadesJewel I too lived in a world of anger and would strike out at everyone and anything that I felt was hurting me. It takes time and working through your trauma is the only way to get to a point that you level out. You never be completely in control of your emotions. There will always be the times that something, someone will make that defensive attitude/protective barrier pop up again, but you can get so much better...
 
Saelben said:
I sorta have this too easy to bond, hard to unbond, which tears me apart often.
Click to expand...

For me it's like this:

I have an easy time getting to know people in the beginning. After meeting them a couple of times my insecurities kicks in and tells me they don't really like me, care about me and so on. I have a hard time contacting people, because I think I'm not worth their time anyway. So a lot of budding friendships gets lost with me pushing them away by not contacting them.

The unbonding process is therefore fine, I know how to handle that, I can tell myself I don't really care, because they didn't really know me that well anyway. It's the closeness I can't handle, I keep people at arms length because in the end I'm always afraid of getting hurt. You can't hurt me if your not close.

Complicated, but I think I depended a lot on people in my life for emotional support, and then they turned their
backs or hurt me badly. I trusted everyone to treat me good, and I was so naive when I was younger. And now it's like this.

I think both bonding issues and unbonding issues is the fear of getting hurt, getting discarded by people?
 
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