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I Swore I'd Never Feel This Way Again

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Life_in_the_Mist

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Well, after one lovely year where I began to come out of my depersonalization and back to my body, a situation I don't feel safe in and can't get out of has set me back to Depersonalization Square One. Soooo upset...I am a floating head...food had no taste... I have no feelings...all that fun stuff. Not sure what I'm looking for here...support/other experiences I guess?

::cry::
 
Life in the mist,

I am sorry. :( Remember that these coping methods are deeply ingrained and when there enough pressure we can revert to them. It's OK. You can work on grounding and up your coping skills again.

When I am able I try to see dissociation as an indication that something has pushed my buttons. This situation has pushed your buttons.

Just because you feel zoned out doesn't mean you are going to stay like that. What can you do to feel safer and more grounded? Hugs if you want them.
 
It might help to have someone read this to you slowly so you can practice:

Grab and object--a stone, coffee cup, pen. Sit with you feet flat on the floor. Close your eyes. Take a slow, deep breath and feel the air move through your nose, down your throat, into your lungs and back up and through your mouth and past your lips. Feel you chest expand as you breath, how it displaces your body as it moves. Feel your forehead relax, feel your cheeks relax, feel you mouth relax, your neck muscles relax, your shoulders relax, your arms, your hands, feel your chest relax, you hips relax, your legs, your feet relax. Feel your feet where they touch the floor. Feel them exchange the energy with the earth. Feel the object in your hand. Run your fingers along its edges. Feel its smoothness, its sharpness, its imperfections. Notice any changes in its texture. Breath deep, feel your breath and when you are ready, open your eyes.
 
It will take a few times of practice to get there. If you don't want to have someone read it to you, record it yourself and put it into your phone or ipod.
 
Sometimes I take a hot bath to help me stay present or I hug a pillow and try to focus my attention on something in the room. I also have a mood disorder and this can affect how I feel. Safe hugs.
 
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