Undiagnosed I Think I Have PTSD

[RubyBlue]

Pinterest has several worksheets and notes you can find for free, I believe there are other sites as well. Most of the information from it is pretty widespread. On Amazon you can get an extensive workbook for about $30. Considering everything it covers it’s not a bad price.

 

[playingvideogames]

um ok 30 bucks is not free and a lot of this stuff seems like cognitive behavioral therapy with a different name.

 

[joeylittle]

Also always had health insurance so none of this has too do with that.

You said you've had no luck trying to get inpatient psych care by going through the ER, and you've done at least one failed intake interview for inpatient.

Getting good inpatient care is hard. And, like you've experienced - you won't get there through the ER.

So: if you can't do full private pay, and want to work within the health care system to get help - it sounds like you're at minimum going to need an advocate.

You might qualify as a vulnerable adult, and that would get you access to a social worker (caseworker), who could help you with communicating your needs. But you'll (probably) need to go through all the steps of obtaining a primary care doc, being referred to a psychiatrist/psychologist, possibly neuropsychologist, and then (finally) being referred to an appropriate inpatient or outpatient program.

Because, there are any number of things that could be leading to your outbursts...But I want to echo what Friday said, here:

Autism creates a baseline neurology that is difficult & complex to work with... in no small part because it’s such a HUGE spectrum...Add in things like trauma &/or other comorbid disorders? <low whistle> PTSD is relatively simple/straightforward. A lot of other disorders are fiendishly complex/complicated to work with.

You'll need to sort out your autism, and whether or not it's the main cause of your explosions. If it is, then no amount of cognitive therapy (like dialectical behavioral therapy, DBT - or cognitive behavioral therapy, CBT) is going to help. And if you try and do those things on your own, without any guidance from an in-person doctor or therapist - you'll potentially become even more upset and frustrated.

It's why I asked about money, because in the US, money cuts through the hoops. You'd just have to get to a good hospital (McLean, Mass General, John Hopkins, Mayo Clinic, UCLA, Stanford, Mennenger Clinic...).

Here's a few links for resources for adults with autism
autism speaks website, resources for adults
Dead Link Removed
UCLA Resnick Neuropsych center autism info

I'm not saying you're not also dealing with PTSD, it's possible you are - but it sounds like your diagnosis isn't going to be straightforward, and it could make a difference, to get it right.

 

[joeylittle]

DBT Self Help is a good free resource, if you want to look into it more.

lot of this stuff seems like cognitive behavioral therapy with a different name.

It's much more detailed, and is designed specifically to address emotional regulation problems, managing explosions, communication, etc - but yes, it's a thought-based therapy, and it builds on some CBT fundamentals.

Also: NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) is an extremely helpful website, especially for getting more info about your own local resources, support groups, etc. I really recommend you check it out, if you haven't already.

 

[RubyBlue]

um ok 30 bucks is not free and a lot of this stuff seems like cognitive behavioral therapy with a different name.

Just trying to help with the resources I know.

 

[Movingforward10]

@playingvideogames , some great advice from everyone here.

Look at what has happened, you have reached out. A group of people are giving you advice based on their personal experiences and therefore giving you a bit of support. You started that process. Which is great.

Part of making our internal changes is listening to advice, even if we think it's wrong or not helpful. If my therapist says something that I think 'no way, not me, not helpful', I've now learnt to think about why I respond like that and to not dismiss it just like that. And when I've taken the time to digest what she has said, I've realised she has been right and my belief was wrong.

So maybe try and think about your responses too? The great thing about this forum is that it isn't immediate in that you get time to think about how you want to respond to people. I.e. you can start to practice not doing what you call verbal vomit if anything someone says on here triggers you as you get time to think before responding. Maybe this will help?

 

[playingvideogames]

First I just want to say thank you for the support and the response time here is amazing. A really big, big thank you to you all for the help and the responses. You guys are awesome. Annalyn I am sorry your right that was rude let me just apologize. Wow, Joeylittle Thank you so much for all the time and effort you put into your well written responses. Also Annalynn thank you and everyone.
Ok I just had to write that first because I need to take a moment and thank you all. Now I have very little money just enough to live. Nothing more. But I also know that if you have money it does not mean anything because I have know parents that have burned a 100 grand or more trying to figure out how to best help their autistic child and the where left with more questions than they had answers so even being able to pay is no guarantee that your going to find answers.
Also once you start down that road there is a ton of stigma attached to it and you start to have to get signed off on things from you psyche doctor in order to a lot of things in your life. For example I knew of a lawyer with bipolar who passed her bar but had to wait over a year while they watched her and made sure she was doing what her doctor told her before they actually gave her the license to practice law and when the judge did sign off on it he told her that usually they don't allow people with her issues to practice law. So you have to deal with that crap as well.
Once you place yourself inside of the system that is all you become is the label the assign to you. I know I delt with this kind of messed up thinking when I was getting services for my developmental disabilities. Always treated as if I didn't know anything because I had a label that tagged me as autistic. So no I am also not anxious to go back under the guise of another experience like that. I had to leave the services for my autism because they made me feel worse about who I was then just living with the sym[ptoms of autism and having delt with a lot of the junk that passes as mainstream mental health in this country it is no different on that side either. Once you get labeled then you no longer know best about you the doctors and the caregivers do. Who wants that.
It is a screwed up world for those with mental health and the world is no better if you just have a developmental disability either.

 

[playingvideogames]

@MovingForward thank you for responding and the awesome encouragement you gave I am posting this after the above because your response did not pop up until after I posted the last thing. I have tried with some success over the beast but only some not enough where I could survive a job or completely keep myself out of the hot seat.
Yes I have had to hold back even in here. I have been able to pause and take a breath before I posted a regretful statement or say a hurtful comment. And was able to erase and change a response to something more appropriate. It feels good to have these victories but I promise you they are far and few. The norm is still the vomit.

 

[Movingforward10]

@MovingForward thank you for responding and the awesome encouragement you gave I am posting this after the above because your response did not pop up until after I posted the last thing. I have tried with some success over the beast but only some not enough where I could survive a job or completely keep myself out of the hot seat.
Yes I have had to hold back even in here. I have been able to pause and take a breath before I posted a regretful statement or say a hurtful comment. And was able to erase and change a response to something more appropriate. It feels good to have these victories but I promise you they are far and few. The norm is still the vomit.

Even if the norm is still vomit, you should be proud of yourself for taking the time to change your response and think it through, even if it is just on here. It's a start. As the saying goes: Rome wasn't built in a day. Small steps lead to larger ones.

And it's totally understandable that if your experience of the 'system' wasn't positive before that it is going to make you hesitant now.
I don't know how the systems work in the US, but here in the UK we usually go to our general practitioner (our doctor we are registered with) and they then make referrals to the relevant places. Is it similar in the US?

 

[playingvideogames]

I mean probably more then likely here if you expressed to your primary care doctor here that you needed mental health services he would get a list for referrals but your on your own to set up first appointments and get things started in that area. But over here it is more like they are almost two separate entities not really connected to each other. But I mean they really should be one bleeds into the other. I mean if you have chronic medical issues it can cause mental health problems like depression and vise versa as well mental health issues can sometimes lead to medical problems. Like how your more likely to get sick if your stressed.

 

[joeylittle]

Banned, locking.