I'm 37 And Feel Like I Need To Be Re Taught Basic Concepts

[Punky143]

Simplistic was used loosely because in my world, its everything but simple. Its as if I need to be re taught things such as, why humans need to interact, what is a friend and how do we have them without ruining it, and basically way back when clearly I was in survival mode therefore wasn't present in school. I cringe at the thought of what my IQ would be because I remember little about all subjects. I hope this isn't confusing and someone can relate.

 

[Beemo3780]

I can relate. I used to be pretty social, but then after being in an abusive marriage for so long, I have trouble interacting with people now. I used to be totally trusting, and now I'm afraid of new people. Once I get to know people, I'm still a little skiddish. I've always been a very empathetic person, and have wanted to help anyone who needed it, and I only learned over the years that makes me an easy target. So now, I'm guarded to the point of not really having anything to do with people. I have become very socially inept.

My PTSD symptoms are mostly full of anxiety and being overly cautious. I feel like I'm always in that fight or flight mode where I need to flee at anytime.

 

[aut555]

I can relate. I used to be pretty social, but then after being in an abusive marriage for so long, I...

Feel like you needed to be guarded in life. Predators do exist and you need to look out for yourself.

 

[One step at a time]

I feel it. I missed a lot, in terms of basic, social interaction and school-wise. Nothing for me to do but start learning again. There is no use for me in looking at where I "should" or could be.

By the way, there's good news: (1) your IQ is unaffected by what you do or don't know (2) although IQ is supposed to measure intelligence, it's not actually too good at that. Odds are, you are plenty smart enough to do what you want to.
And you, as a person, are more than good enough for other people. You are valuable. With practice, you will connect with people well enough for them to see that.

 

[Rani G2]

Simplistic was used loosely because in my world, its everything but simple.

Punky143, there is nothing wrong with wanting, or lets say needing to dissect things to simplicity. I dont know if dissecting is the right word, but removing out everything unnecessary, heavy and just hindering. So, there is nothing wrong with that? What do you think? Most of us never had role models, no one truly showed us healthy relationships, where people actively teached what selfrespect means, and how we value other people and relationships. Its never too late though, there is a lot we can discover...always.

I have issues with my mind. When I came into this part of the world, I had to learn to how to actually go to the grocery store, and I didnt speak the language. I stood infront of the cashier and looked like a complete idiot, shivering.


Shankara

 

[aut555]

Plus it's ok to walk your path alone in life. Lots of singles according to census. The biggest population is single people over 45 in the major cities that live alone. Maybe it's social media, but people interact much more online these days.

 

[EmmaOwl]

I have become very socially inept.

Me too. That's one thing I practice on this site. I basically sleepwalked through the first decade of the 2000's and I have no social media. I lost contact with almost every friend and I don't know how to meet new ones. And when I do meet new people - which is rare - I am busy worrying about what to do and say to seem "normal", until I can get on my own and freak out by the anxiety that I have been hiding the other person/people. It is very disconcerting and difficult.

people interact much more online these days.

This was JUST starting to happen when I completely fell apart from PTSD, and then I spent several years afraid to go near a computer, so I have zero social media. Again - this site is sort of my experiment of communicating with other people in what I think of as a safe place - a place where there are people who understand how seriously effed up you can be from PTSD and any long term severe mental illness, or being detached from the world. I'm trying to figure out how to communicate with other people after severe isolation.

But sometimes? I just want to talk to people on the damn phone!! :confused::sorry:

 

[Punky143]

Thanks everyone. I guess its the whole fragmented thing I'm struggling with. Being the classic but quiet borderline, I desire friendships but don't have the patience, and trust. I'm in my own world bothered by things even I can't explain so for now, going to work head down with the desire to just make it through without someone most likely pissing me off.