Hello,
I wasn't sure where to post this but decided this category would be best since there are post flairs that can be added.
Anyway, at the end of January of January 2024, I was held at gunpoint then pistol whipped in the back of my head while working a closing shift by myself. Since then, I've been on workers comp and doing CBT therapy. I was shortly diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, and panic disorder.
Around February of 2024, I was hit out of nowhere with all kinds of mental health issues that I've never experienced before. The PTSD symptoms ramped up, the anxiety turned into physical symptoms, and the panic attacks ensued. I've experienced flash backs, nightmares, heightened anxiety, DPDR, dissociation, visual snow syndrome (and all of its symptoms), short term memory issues, difficulty concentrating, moderate depression, avoidance, hypervigilance, health anxiety, hyperarousal and probably more I can't remember; All in which kept me inside for most of the 2 years where I would just end up in my head dealing with negative feedback loops of intrusive thoughts.
Fast forward to this year, I've definitely improved about 85% of what I was pre-traumatic incident. I still deal with some anxiety, mild flash backs, mild, mild dissociation, mild visual snow syndrome symptoms (still have grainy vision + light sensitivity + negative afterimages + tinnitus), mild avoidance, and the hypervigilance + hyperarousal is still lingering, vertigo, and the off balance sensation like I'm walking on a trampoline when I go into public places or walk in narrow hallways (PPPD dizziness/vestibular migraines). I believe with the CBT and taking things into my own hands such as research to understand what is happening and why it's happening along with mindfulness meditation, it has allowed me to manage my symptoms a lot better and caused them to come around less. I got a CT scan of my head too which came back clear. As far as seeing a Neurologist, my WC Doctor doesn't believe I need to see one and thinks everything I've been experiencing is due to anxiety. I saw a Psychologist but they wanted to throw me on SSRI's right away which I do not want to take as I took them when I was younger and had really bad side effects.
What I'm feeling right now is everything "feels louder" which is making it difficult for me to feel more present and quiet minded. I feel like I hear everything more easily and things are more visually stimulating. The best way I explained this feeling to my therapist is like someone who drinks an energy drink and you start to experience hyperexcitability where everything feels and looks "loud."
However, I'm coming to a point now where at the end of January 2026, I will be required to go back to work due to workers comp only being 2 years. I've told my WC Doctor and Therapist numerous times that I do not want to return back to the same workplace. What's difficult is that I'm a Manager of a retail chain store and my location is further out than everyone else's so HR doesn't want me to swap stores with another Manager because the chances of them having to now travel far is high and that isn't fair to them. Looking for another job is an option for me but I am also afraid of the same thing happening to me again no matter where I go or the people who held me at gunpoint will find me again even though the chances are slim to none. I've thought about work from home but I can't continue being in my apartment for however much longer than I have been for 8 hours a day. I think being away from my apartment with newer distractions such as a daily routine and work will allow me to feel present again.
Thank you for taking the time to read and if anyone can relate or has tips/tricks, that would be great. If any of you know, workers comp in Texas only pays 60% of your wages which is peanuts to most and bills don't stop so I will need to go back to work sooner than later.
I wasn't sure where to post this but decided this category would be best since there are post flairs that can be added.
Anyway, at the end of January of January 2024, I was held at gunpoint then pistol whipped in the back of my head while working a closing shift by myself. Since then, I've been on workers comp and doing CBT therapy. I was shortly diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, and panic disorder.
Around February of 2024, I was hit out of nowhere with all kinds of mental health issues that I've never experienced before. The PTSD symptoms ramped up, the anxiety turned into physical symptoms, and the panic attacks ensued. I've experienced flash backs, nightmares, heightened anxiety, DPDR, dissociation, visual snow syndrome (and all of its symptoms), short term memory issues, difficulty concentrating, moderate depression, avoidance, hypervigilance, health anxiety, hyperarousal and probably more I can't remember; All in which kept me inside for most of the 2 years where I would just end up in my head dealing with negative feedback loops of intrusive thoughts.
Fast forward to this year, I've definitely improved about 85% of what I was pre-traumatic incident. I still deal with some anxiety, mild flash backs, mild, mild dissociation, mild visual snow syndrome symptoms (still have grainy vision + light sensitivity + negative afterimages + tinnitus), mild avoidance, and the hypervigilance + hyperarousal is still lingering, vertigo, and the off balance sensation like I'm walking on a trampoline when I go into public places or walk in narrow hallways (PPPD dizziness/vestibular migraines). I believe with the CBT and taking things into my own hands such as research to understand what is happening and why it's happening along with mindfulness meditation, it has allowed me to manage my symptoms a lot better and caused them to come around less. I got a CT scan of my head too which came back clear. As far as seeing a Neurologist, my WC Doctor doesn't believe I need to see one and thinks everything I've been experiencing is due to anxiety. I saw a Psychologist but they wanted to throw me on SSRI's right away which I do not want to take as I took them when I was younger and had really bad side effects.
What I'm feeling right now is everything "feels louder" which is making it difficult for me to feel more present and quiet minded. I feel like I hear everything more easily and things are more visually stimulating. The best way I explained this feeling to my therapist is like someone who drinks an energy drink and you start to experience hyperexcitability where everything feels and looks "loud."
However, I'm coming to a point now where at the end of January 2026, I will be required to go back to work due to workers comp only being 2 years. I've told my WC Doctor and Therapist numerous times that I do not want to return back to the same workplace. What's difficult is that I'm a Manager of a retail chain store and my location is further out than everyone else's so HR doesn't want me to swap stores with another Manager because the chances of them having to now travel far is high and that isn't fair to them. Looking for another job is an option for me but I am also afraid of the same thing happening to me again no matter where I go or the people who held me at gunpoint will find me again even though the chances are slim to none. I've thought about work from home but I can't continue being in my apartment for however much longer than I have been for 8 hours a day. I think being away from my apartment with newer distractions such as a daily routine and work will allow me to feel present again.
Thank you for taking the time to read and if anyone can relate or has tips/tricks, that would be great. If any of you know, workers comp in Texas only pays 60% of your wages which is peanuts to most and bills don't stop so I will need to go back to work sooner than later.
