I'm Way Too Embarrassed To Talk About Sex Or Boyfriends

[Zipip]

I've experienced ctrauma. I'm 20. I've huge trouble with having close friends and I've never had a boyfriend. Alongside the bulk of my ctrauma, I have experienced a bit of sexual harassment, nothing serious, nothing compared to what I read here. But even though sex and boyfriends are a big challenge for me, something I'd like to have. I am WAY to embarrassed to talk about it in therapy, even more embarrassed that I'm embarrassed about talking about it.

 

[Ina]

I totally understand being embarrassed to talk about sex ..... but therapists are used to talking about it, its just another topic to them. I think it would be really helpful for you to talk about it with your T, maybe write down that you have issues around sex but are embarrassed to talk about it and give it to your T and see how they respond. When there is a topic I am embarrassed about I prefer my T to ask questions that I answer rather than me having to do all the talking.
I hope you are able to bring it up with your T
:)

 

[Jikolo]

I definitely understand being too embarrassed to talk about sex and relationships in therapy. I felt like my T was this proper woman (my parents' age) so how could I possibly have a rational conversation about sex with her?! What if she thinks I'm pathetic or whatever. But, it was fine. I started by writing the topic in an e-mail and eventually she answered my request and brought up the topic in person. It was easier for me to have my side of the conversation already sent to her in writing (or you could hand it to her) because then I couldn't back out or start fibbing or hiding. She has her own opinions about sex that do differ from mine, and I would like to talk about sex, etc. more than we have, because there is still a lot of shame (and triggers) there that I need to work through, but one step at a time. Sometimes it feels guilty because I feel like I am using her for discussions that are only necessary due to my lack of close friends, but it's my time, right? So, try writing it to her. Write how difficult it is for you to touch this topic and ask her to open the conversation for you.