DID Inner chaos with parts

[Punky143]

I've struggled with my parts who become triggered easily by noise, smell, tactile, visual and ole factory hallucinations. I've tried creating safe places for them to go when things are tough and I need to accomplish tasks. This has become a problem at work and has left to disorganization, land ack of comprehension with the little things. I try and go outside and get fresh air, and will sit in my car to allow parts to decompress. I'm struggling and for once require help from coworkers. I'm embarrassed and feel like I'm failing. My t asked today if the parts are willing to work together for my sake because I can't loose my job. But it's so hard trying to get everyone to consistently do that. They need more time in session to talk about certain things that I believe would work. I know things aren't working and change is needed but it feels so overwhelming and think the concept of willingness is to broad for them to understand.. we need it broken down for each part and slowly. I have like there's chaos inside, all of them need to separately work on it very slowly. I'm very depressed and I feel like I'm failing fast. I ashamed and embarrassed and have tried working on this for a long time. My parts need to get their stories out but they are scared. I can't ignore this because other people are starting to notice and don't understand. What a lonely place to be in.

 

[beaneeboo]

Just wanted to acknowledge your loneliness in this.. i know it's hard... i've been in a similar place...

have you got an HR department or equivalent you feel you could talk to about your specific difficulties? or a GP? it sounds like to me that over all your struggling with overwhelm... the demands of work are currently too much for all of you and it's triggering symptoms making it even harder to carry out your job.... in the very first instance can you acknowledge this with all parts of you... are you able to do anything so you can have an immediate break from the situation to give you time to think about things? can you ask yourselves what you need in the immediate instance to feel less overwhelm? less hours, more breaks, a different environmental set up, stopping working with certain people, not to be doing certain tasks etc....

i feel anxious just reading that back. Sorry.. .lots of questions and lots of thoughts, so I'm not sure if it's useful...