Is It Better To Reflect On Traumas Or Block Them Out?

[Cool Cat]

at what point does reflecting slide into dwelling? And even if it is dwelling, could I stop myself if I tried?

I feel the same way, it's such a hard balance to make.

 

[Tanishq]

@Cool Cat I don't have therapist. I have learned facing the worst is best sometimes. I know I have so many worst memories, but I try one a time and try to process it. We can escape for a while, but we can't escape our fears/memories for the whole time. At some point we have to face it and get the job done with it by moving on. It's very crazy.

 

[Dana1010]

get the job done

I hear this sentiment a lot but no one every really explains what the "job" is or how you do it.

 

[Cool Cat]

Yeah I agree with you @Dana1010, I used to have a terrible habit of cutting myself in order to increase productivity. The end certainly didn't justify the means, I havent done that in about six months. However, still haven't found a substitute.

 

[Tanishq]

@Dana1010 I am sorry for that difficulty. I understand little about that sentiment and I would like to say, never fall in how's? You just have to go for it. Make some errors first and then learn from it. Keep fine tuning it. This is all I understand honestly. This year I tried to move on from some harmful people, I just went for it. It has brought little peace in my life. Less struggle. I hope this makes some sense to you and it helps you. :)

 

[The Albatross]

Where do you want to use your effort... to live or to defend/block? I choose to live.

 

[The Albatross]

We do @Cool Cat have the benefit of choice. It is though for most of us a two edged sword. Regardless, you can reasonably expect to be uncomfortable. Yet another reason, why I chose the way I did. I do not elect to keep myself, my world or the people around me small.

 

[Ronin]

@The Albatross, that's though acting as if one's treatment of their life, traumata, etc, is always voluntary. Or even the most important parts of it. That isn't the case. And wanting to change attitude about this or that? Sometimes may be way easier said than done. How one goes about healing, isn't really just about attitude.

Trauma causes physical changes in the brain. You can't call that a problem of wrong choices. Not even in implications.

 

[The Albatross]

I'm a simple creature If I'm present... I assume it's either voluntary or preordained. Fate, yeah I believe it. I also believe in the inherent responsibility of individual character development, independent and apart from sorrow, traumas, adversity including death.

That is where the rubber (for me) hits the road. Personal responsibility... I'm all about it.

 

[The Albatross]

P.S. I don't have to act. I just have to believe. There is a difference.

Is it any different then the self depreciating shit I swallowed for a great many years... uh no not really except that there is a generally beneficial belief that "best serves me moving forward". Perception is not a sworn enemy... it can be an ally if you choose to use it appropriately.

 

[TonyG]

I bottled mine up and kept it contained for 30 years and a couple of months ago it hit me like a truck, I tryed to keep it together but I couldn't as the anxiety has been overpowering, Apart from having a flu I have never been on medication and now I can't live without it, I'm trying hard to find that control again but it's beating me this time.

 

[The Albatross]

Very sorry Tony... pay it now or pay it later... but pay you will. That's my motto/mantra. Deal, deal, deal with it and manage peeps. Blocking is an illusion that will bite you in the ass someday.