Is It Possible To Dissociation Unnoticeably?

[GWhizz]

Maybe the abuse wasn't as prevalent after 10-11? Ie you didn't dissociate as much?

I want to be present...

Things unfortunately got a lot worse at that age, at least I was pretty much forced to be present. I relate to that in my late teens/early 20's, sleeping around and engaging in risk behaviours etc. Thankfully I learned to balance myself a bit more since

 

[SometimesWriter]

Unless I'm deep in it is apparently not easy to see that I'm in. I've had lots of problems in therapy a...

This is the same problem I'm having in my daily life with my relationships - I don't actively put myself in a dissociative state, but when I'm in one my defenses kick in and I don't think anyone realizes I've checked out. I'm an actor by hobby so that could play a huge part in it, my BF and I will get into arguments and he'll think I'm still there until he asks me to specifically go back over something I just said in greater detail, which I can't, then he realizes I'm not there anymore and one or both of us walks away until I become more present. Really trying to break this cycle and I'm relieved to see I'm not the only one who experiences it in this way!

 

[Megyn]

Things unfortunately got a lot worse at that age, at least I was pretty much forced to be present. I rel...

Me too, ie balance. No drugs or drinking. No sleeping around. Very little risk behaviors. I've come a long way but sometimes feel worse, lol... I guess "feel" is the key word there :)

Is your story in trauma diaries? If I already read and/or commented, apologies. My memory is shot.

 

[GWhizz]

Me too, ie balance. No drugs or drinking. No sleeping around. Very little risk behaviors. I've come a lon...

Link Removed

I never actually wrote my story... Had planned to get to it eventually but I don't think my membership statue will currently allow me add to it now. I don't think I could write a whole lot online though.. It's a struggle even trying to for therapy

 

[SherryAnn]

Yes it is possible and even common. I had to be told when I was doing it a lot of the time. The problem is that I knew when I was doing it severely, like if I had sat in one spot staring out the window for 8 hours without moving, or if I felt that weird drugged out of touch feeling come on really fast in a situation. But if it was not either of those I was rarely aware of it.

yes totally @coco9 I totally agree its the same for me.x

 

[SherryAnn]

Maybe the abuse wasn't as prevalent after 10-11? Ie you didn't dissociate as much?

I want to be present...

OMG our life sounds soooo similar and lots of other people with ptsd too and yes they thought I had bipolar or bpd as well but finally a psychiatrist who has dealt with vets recognised it and after decades of struggle I'm finally learning how to manage it with proper therapy.

 

[Megyn]

OMG our life sounds soooo similar and lots of other people with ptsd too and yes they thought I ha...

I know... so many of us experience similar things. Strange about the misdiagnosis because I remember a doctor, a GP from my 20s who was highly inappropriate with me, perhaps grooming me because, well it doesn't matter now... anyways he told me I'd been sexually abused. Interesting that later on I'd be completely misdiagnosed.

This is weird: I just remembered, too, I had a therapist in my mid-late 30s who I wanted to hypnotize me to "get it all out". She wouldn't and said I'd have a hard time finding a hypnotherapist who would even do it when there are repressed memories and sexual abuse involved as it could have caused a psychotic break. I remember having some test done, almost like a lie detector. It measured my voice, subtle changes in it to questions they asked me based on info I'd disclosed during therapy. The outcome of this test was I'd been abused by my father. So, I knew back then, shit, I didnt even repress some things and pretty much knew my whole life, yet 5 years later I'd have a nervous breakdown and be misdiagnosed/not properly medicated for about 4 years afterwards. I must not have said anything about it? God, I don't remember :/ Maybe they were more concerned with the symptoms I was presenting at that time- suicidal, cutting, ed, flat affectation, etc

 

[BuckarooBanzai]

So question, can you really dissociate without someone that close noticing?

Absolutely!

As someone above mentioned, DID operates best in secrecy. We do our very best, most of the time, to keep others from noticing our dissociative episodes. Now, that's difficult to manage if a child alter comes out, but if an adult alter comes out it's usually easy.

Ben

 

[BuckarooBanzai]

What scares me most is when she's saying something and it's like she's literally speaking a foreign language. I don't understand, the words she says aren't even familiar to me. It hasn't happened much, but def frightening.

Not to worry. What this means is, the person is saying something you are not ready to hear and process. Your mind perceives the message as 'dangerous', something too scary to hear, and so your mind makes it all seem like a foreign language.

I've seen this happen twice.Once, a friend with PTSD and DID wrote me an email asking me for information on something in particular. I answered, then she wrote back to say that the second paragraph of my response came back looking like gobbledy-gook; she asked me to resend the email. Well this happened three times. On her third request, I read my original response carefully, and noted that the second paragraph, in particular, was dealing with a really difficult topic, one that I had noted, in the past, she hadn't been able to handle. So, apparently, she read the email fine every time until she got to paragraph two; at that point, her mind blanked it all out.

Anyhow, it just means you feel you are not able or ready to hear what this person has to say. You are just protecting yourself.

Ben

 

[Megyn]

Not to worry. What this means is, the person is saying something you are not ready to hear and p...

Thank you :)
It's good to know that...

 

[GWhizz]

Absolutely!

As someone above mentioned, DID operates best in secrecy. We do our very best, most...

Well I have not been diagnosed with DID nor do I believe I have it. This is part of what scares me. I am so confused by myself. I have PTSD with dissociative symptoms

 

[EveHarrington]

Link Removed

I never actually wrote my s...

I think you can just ask mods to unlock it. I think old threads are locked.