Is It Possible To Really Get Better

[sage18]

I keep on thinking that I am better and no longer suffering from PTSD and this can last several months. During those months I can still feel badly triggered and upset sometimes but I always think I've overcome it and then suddenly it's just back again. I feel like it tends to happen during school holidays when I have no distractions but it just makes me feel like it isn't possible to fully recover from PTSD. Do you think it is? I just feel really negative about recovery right now.

 

[franciemarnie]

Have you read much about how PTSD comes about and how it effects the brain and changes your system? Are you thinking it's like mind over matter or that it fades with time? I guess I am not sure how you thought it had been overcome. What a drag to really think that and then have the symptoms reemerge. That would be utterly demoralizing.

In case you haven't, you might want to do some research about how PTSD effects the body and brain and then it won't be as surprising when it rears its ugly head.

That said, I personally think for sure a person with PTSD can get better. They just have to find the healing solutions or remedies or therapies that work for them.

I have definitely been distracted by life events that temporarily put PTSD on the back burner only to have it take center stage again when the big distractions were over.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

I'm not sure if full recovery is an option for everybody. There are links on the forum which discuss how there are chemical changes to the body on a genetic level, and even after much healing is done, these changes can persist. I don't say this to be discouraging, rather to say that trauma has changed our bodies, perhaps permanently. I also think that if we assume we have overcome PTSD, then a flare in symptoms can be devastating and make one feel like a failure. But, if there is a view that PTSD can go into remission with possible flare ups, then if symptoms do spike, one takes it as less of a blow, and doesn't see it as a failure to overcome this disorder. Does this make sense?

 

[sage18]

Thank you both for your replies. I'm going to do a bit more research into PTSD. I have fairly minor PTSD so I always just think that it'd gone away through counseling etc but it never really has. You're right, I think that looking on PTSD as something I will always have to manage will probably make my recovery easier and it will be nice if I ever do manage to fully recover. I think with the right medication and counseling I'm just going to have to learn to control it. :(

 

[Deleted member 19804]

I know how you feel. With me, it's mostly just "refusing" to believe I have PTSD. I lock up all the bad memories and the fears and the negative thoughts in one small corner of my mind and replace them with positive thoughts like "I'm doing just fine" and "I don't need any help, I can just push through life myself".

But once in a while, all of those negative feelings force themselves out of their "prison" and fill my head again, mostly in the form of fear. Then I'm once again terrified of the man walking too closely behind me, and I can't sleep because I'm reliving all of those repressed memories.

It's in those moments that I once again realize that I do have a problem and that I have to take it seriously. Because no matter how hard I work to repress my PTSD, it will always come back, and with a vengeange too.

Does that sound familiar?

Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that trauma doesn't just disappear if you talk about it a few times. It just gets more accessible for processing, which is a good step, but it's not the finish line yet. I believe that in order to really get better, and yes, I do believe we can, we have to really open up our minds and slowly and gently reprocess our trauma(s). I like to see PTSD as a bug in a computer system, which causes your brain (the computer) to crash. In order to get rid of the bug, you have to do more than restart the computer; you have to find it and fix it, so that your brain processes can run smoothly again. And that takes a lot of time and effort. But it's not impossible.

Hope this helps

 

[sage18]

Snowwhite, you basically explained exactly how I feel. Thank you so much for your reassuring reply and that definitely makes sense to me. I think that is going to be my new way to visualize recovery; a bug in a computer system. Now I think it's just down to the process of finding and fixing the bug.

Thanks so much for your help.

 

[Deleted member 19804]

You're welcome :) I'm very glad I could be of help

 

[Rizen]

I get this too. I'll be doing better than it comes back; it's really hard to plan anything when I might be suffering from PTSD stuff but I never know for sure when. :( I am doing generally better than a few years ago. PTSD can improve and be less intrusive but I don't know if it ever fully is cured.

 

[Hashi]

My belief - and experience - is that you get better if you process it enough. Processing isn't necessarily having counselling, although that can be part of it. There are other threads here about what processing means. In my case, it's been necessary to have somatic therapy and to work with imagery as well.

Today I was at a gallery and there was an exhibition with explicit images (there was a warning at the entrance). I found it pretentious and ridiculous, and wandered off to look at something more interesting. Some time later that it occurred to me that four years ago those images would have made me physically and emotionally sick. Four years ago, I wouldn't even have gone past the warning notice at the entrance. Thinking about it, I could see connections between the images and some of my traumas. But those trauma reactions aren't being activated any more, because they're fully processed and assigned to the past.

There are other things I haven't fully worked through yet, about early childhood trauma, although I'm getting there. On the train on the way home there was someone with a baby in the seat behind me. I wasn't distressed, but I did think a lot about my reactions to the baby. I'm looking forward to the time when I don't give other people's babies any more thought than I gave to the explicit images in the gallery.

Something I keep noticing in these sorts of discussions is that the people who believe it's possible to completely recover seem to be those (like me) who've had some sort of somatic trauma therapy, as well as other types of therapy.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I think that healing and recovery is a lifetime journey and I am experiencing that now. There are even days when I feel joy.

But I do not believe that it can be cured. Mabe for some people, but sadly not for me.

I started my healing journey in 1985 and it has taken me so long to get to the point that I am.

I had EMDR and it totally changed my life for the better. The support I have received here on the forum has been so useful and helpful to me to get me through the rough times.

I am living a mostly normal life, but I still see a psychiatrist and am on medication for my anxiety disorder, the medication has stabilized me greatly.

Great post. There is hope as long as you keep working through your issues.

Today the past is in the past, and I have been able to forgive most people for the abuse. I am no longer like a haunted house tormented by memories of the past.

I have a few triggers which when caught off guard, throw me into the occasional panic attack which does not last as long as they used to.

It has for me become more about managing my symptoms.

You are a survivor and so worth fighting for.