General Lack of motivation

  • Post starter Post starter Eve13333
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Eve13333

Hello! First time poster here.

My friend has struggled for a long time with motivation. For example, he was fired from a cafe job because he just couldn't be bring himself to do the whole script, put on a friendly face or even remember the orders. It's affected his schoolwork similarly, as well as his relationships and friendships. Right now, he's having job interviews, but can't bring himself to speak in a bubbly tone, give thoughtful answers, or try to impress them.

Despite all this, he feels really depressed when he doesn't do well in these endeavours; he asks what's wrong with him, why he can't do anything, etc. He has passions he doesn't feel able to dedicate time or effort to; it feels like a waste of time, not worth the effort, too hard, etc.

He's aware that he's not putting effort into these tasks, and wants to, but just can't bring himself; it feels fake and impossible to pull off.

He's had quite extensive trauma dating back to childhood, and any attempts to seek formal support have resulted in further trauma due to medical malpractice (e.g. blaming him for what happened, refusing to see him due to his struggles with motivation).

He wants to be functional and motivated, but it just doesn't feel "like him". I'm aware that trauma affects hormone levels, and have researched this, but we're yet to find anything that gives us advice as to how to change this! Any advice would be much appreciated, preferably not something that requires him to see a psychologist or psychiatrist.
 
He wants to be functional and motivated, but it just doesn't feel "like him". I'm aware that trauma affects hormone levels, and have researched this, but we're yet to find anything that gives us advice as to how to change this! Any advice would be much appreciated, preferably not something that requires him to see a psychologist or psychiatrist.
“Instant Life, No Thinking Required” is one of the tricks I use when my head is so far up my arse that little bump in my throat is my nose.

On the employment side of things? That looks like:

- Habitat For Humanity (Volunteer)
- Disaster Response (Volunteer)
- Paying Volunteer at an archaeological dig (Volunteer)
- Military (Paid)
- Cruise Ship (Paid)
- Commercial Fishing (Paid)
- Circus (paid)

^^^ These are all things where you live/work/play in the same pre-set pre-made environment. That’s actually my FAVOURITE type of job, anyway, shortish stints/gigs (weeks & months, excepting the military) where one is NOT doing the whole Mon-Friday thing, but 24/7 work for a few weeks/months, then 24/7 play for a few weeks/months, then a new gig, then new time off.
 

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