General Lack of Participation by Carers

[Kathy]

Thank you all for the congratulations and kind wishes. I do hope I am able to be useful. I would dearly love to see this area more active again.

 

[Marlene]

Congrats on the new job, Kathy. I know you'll do a great job.

Lisa

 

[Kathy]

Thank you Lisa, I appreciate the confidence.

 

[Alienne]

Yes, it is indeed a bit sad that this section seems to be quite quiet, but then again, from my personal point of view, it´s hard to give vent to very personal "stuff" in a public place, whether we´re talking about my or my husbands issues (especially as he is not in the Forum yet). I´ve told him about this place and he´s said he´ll visit-but only when he´s ready to do so, which I think is the right decision. Therefore, I don´t want to hand out too much private information in a public section. I don´t want to cause him, or myself, anymore hurt, as I feel I´m in here in order to try to help him as well as myself when it comes to PTSD.

 

[Kathy]

I do understand your feelings Alienne, and it is exceedingly mature and thoughtful of you to think of your husband's feelings. That being said however, I started this thread regarding the private forum, not the public one. This public forum actually has a fair bit of activity, it is the private section that is very quiet, although it has shown some signs of life lately. However it is still much less active than this public area.

One thing I personally enjoy in the public area is that I am able to receive opinions and feedback from PTSD sufferers, as they may post freely in here. I have found the experience of others with PTSD very helpful in my dealings with Evie. There are things my husband and I learn from the sufferers that we could not possibly learn from other carers, and we are most grateful for their input.

 

[Alienne]

Oh dear...my mistake, guess I didn´t pay attention on that one! Sorry!

 

[Kathy]

Nothing to be sorry about Alienne; I was simply clarifying. I suppose the public area is a little quiet still as well, but things have picked up quite nicely in the last month or so. The private forum had absolutely no activity for several weeks, I used to post in there occasionally and never get any response, others had the same problem. That was my issue, that if I ever wanted to say something privately it would be pointless, as I would never get feedback. Thankfully that has now changed, as if I post privately now, a few people will respond. So that is positive.

Alienne, I do hope you don't find me forward in saying so, but you do seem quite reluctant to post anything publicly at all. Is it because your husband is military? I am a military wife (or was, my husband has just recently retired). Or are you simply a very private person? There are ways to post whilst not revealing much personal information which could "trace" you so to speak. In any event, I would be delighted if you would feel comfortable enough to participate a bit more.

 

[Nicolette]

Alienne, I do hope you don't find me forward in saying so, but you do seem quite reluctant to post anything publicly at all.

In any event, I would be delighted if you would feel comfortable enough to participate a bit more.

Since I'm a new kid on the block I have a little to contribute on this topic.

Firstly, while I spent hours reading avidly when joining, I felt like a kid starting at a new school where all the students knew each other (the Carers) and while they didn't totally understand the teachers (the PTSD Suffers) they knew who they were.

Secondly, while I had a vague idea of what PTSD was about I didn't want to come in straight away amongst "experienced" people and say something "dumb". While I am intelligent it does not mean I totally comprehend what PTSD is about or what Carers go through other than my first hand experience (which fortunately is quite good).

Thirdly, I found I was extremely self conscious as I knew that some of what I wrote could be read by my partner and while I love him dearly I do not know all of his triggers yet and didn't want to say anything publicly which may inadvertently offend or upset him.

Finally, I guess I was just plain chicken at trying something new. :rolleyes:

Funnily enough, as I have become a member of this amazing community I find myself wanting to come here and talk and I already feel like I have friends here as well - Not just strangers at the other end of a PC. I now look forward to coming here.

 

[Jen]

Nicolette it is good to have you on board! The more Carers on here the better. I found when I first joined I was the same a bit shy of what to say but I was welcomed and look forward to reading replies as there is always good advice from other Carers!
Jen

 

[Nicolette]

Thanks Jen

 

[sillysandy]

I feel it needs to be said, and this is in no way a complaint, but it is sad to me that the Carers board is often so woefully quiet. And if I am permitted to say so (please edit if I am overstepping!), the Private Carers area, of which I am a member, is dead silent and almost useless really. That is unfortunate as there are times when I would like to share and not worry that Evie will be reading and feeling hurt or out of sorts. She has now agreed to stay out of the Carers section all together, as we do wish to speak about her in here, we requested that of her and she has agreed to it. But being a curious person I'm sure she will peek occasionally.

I am wondering what it will take to make this board more active once more. For what it's worth, I would be willing to help in that endeavour, in my own small way, if there was anything that could be done. There are times Jim and I feel so alone in dealing with Evie, dealing with our son too and his death. We have searched other forums, enlisted Evie to assist us, been all over the internet really, looking for family support for PTSD. There really is not much out there. That is why I think it would be splendid if people were more active here, it is very needed I'm afraid.

I hope I have not come across as complaining, really I only wish for some of the support I see those with PTSD receiving in other areas of the forum, and I believe there is an excellent opportunity for that here, should enough people be willing to participate.

Kathy, this is my first time here , but I am a carer, and am a carer representative to several mental health boards etc.
We all need somewhere to come to share concerns, and ideas, even just share something funny, something thats been an interst, or something that you wish could happen through other services etc to make things a little easy for carers, a place where people do understand and don,t ever judge.
Sandy, Australia-- however the saying nothing about us without us, is also something that means to me, lets communicate if we can, then we can agree we all need a place to have our own time, and say, just like a consumer d/ peer group etc.

 

[Kathy]

Welcome to the forum Sandy, lovely to have you. You are a carer representative to mental health boards? As in you sit on boards as an advocate? I formerly was a board member of our local chapter of the Schizophrenia Society and also of the Alzheimer's Society. And I have sat on too many boards to count, in my profession as an MSW. It's not an easy position, well done to you.

Thankfully both sections here, private and public, have become more active of late. I think my complaining helped a bit. :wink:

In any event, very lovely to have you Sandy, I look forward to chatting with you more.