Last january (or maybe even earlier) this year, my therapist told me something traumatic...

[MyWillow]

Desensitization - gradual exposure to a stimulus so that you take less and less notice of it. Could be negative, positive or even neutral. Could be via any of your senses eg putting a sock on your foot - you immediately notice it but soon stop thinking about it.

Sensitisation - you have the same (often slightly negative) experience repeatedly but your fear response gets worse and worse over time. I always think of kids or animals that are constantly going to the hospital or vet for treatment.

Flooding - exposing someone to the fear/phobia in a way that’s supposed to make them realise the fear is not based on something real. This is forced prolonged exposure therapy. I have real issues with this because you have no idea what you are activating. It’s bad enough when a T does it inadvertently let alone with intent. And - as a behaviourist - I think training animals by causing more FEAR is completely unnecessary.

I train by breaking behaviour down into tiny bites. It’s actually fun and effective and fast.

 

[Deleted member 46752]

words can lead to black or white thinking which forms images in the mind which are hard to shake. good to hear however that you and said therapist have good rapport, maybe just try and not personalize it and bring up said story and your reaction to the therapist for ideas on how to ride it

 

[hithere]

I've tried this with some things. It seems to work pretty well, for "simpler" traumas. So, thank you f...

Yes it did to all of those: physical pain and existential "phobia" for lack of better word, and also involuntary vomiting, and hyperventilation, and feeling like I was going out of my head and much more. However, I can't do that with some traumas I have had. I'm stuck with those behind closed doors, and I fear going deeper into some of them. It's actually impossible even if I try.

 

[scout86]

That's really great. I don't think mine even knows I worry about this. I just haven't brought it up.

I didn't bring it up either, he did. He thanked me for trying to do his job for him, but said he was pretty sure be could handle it himself. :rolleyes:

This isn't an uncommon thing. I've done some more reading, since you first posted. Apparently there's a theory. Some sort of "family" is necessary to ensure the survival of a young human. Young humans, in dysfunctional families for example, learn to do what it takes to keep that "family" from falling totally apart. It's a survival thing. Among other things, you learn to protect people, whether it makes sense or not.

Soooo, once it became obvious to my T that I was doing that, he spent a lot of time demonstrating that he had his shit together. That even if he found something upsetting, nothing bad was going to happen. He could be upset and not fall apart. (It's kind of a relief to be able to talk to someone who can take care of themselves!)

 

[littleoc]

That even if he found something upsetting, nothing bad was going to happen. He could be upset and not fall apart. (It's kind of a relief to be able to talk to someone who can take care of themselves!)

Wow. That is comforting

And that theory makes sense, I’m glad you shared it :)