Lauries Trauma's In A Thread

[Deleted member 20280]

Born March 23rd 1971. To a family still mourning the death of their 6 yr old son, a son run down in front of his parents. A 6 yr old boy's limp body, cradled in his fathers arms as he drew his dying breath. a family shattered by tragedy that single moment. I would not be here if (C) had not died that day.

This event was 10 months before my birth, I was not to learn of (C) until I was aged 11 yrs.

My eldest brother (A) resented me from the moment I was born, hated every sinew in my tiny body. An Eldest brother who dropped me headfirst down the stairs aged 3 yrs, who stamped on my tiny little fingers, breaking most of them aged 4 yrs. Beat me around the back of the head from the age of 5 yrs every single night for ten whole years.

An Eldest brother who blamed me for everything that ever happened, beatings from my mother over the years for things I had not done. I HAD NOT DONE!

Raped for near every weekend by their chosen babysitter for a 4-5 yr period, at knife point, that knife end inserted anally on more occasions than I dare or care to remember.

My Childhood was SHIT!

And that is just the beginning of my trauma past. Trust me there are plenty more.

 

[Lionheart]

I hate the abuse for you so much and applaud your healing efforts. Ya know I have always said that it takes guts and determination to heal the kind of wounds we have suffered and I am so proud of you for sharing. I wish you only the best as you heal!!!

 

[Namenotdiagnosis]

I am so sorry to hear abt your traumas and a childhood so scarred . May you heal in time and have all the love and care you missed out on. Have you ever spoken to your family about how you felt and feel? Have you had any sorts of therapy ?

 

[Deleted member 20280]

My family know because now at the age I am I hide nothing, have no shame or guilt. I had EMDR 2 years ago, have been in full self exposure therapy for twelve months, journal all my flashbacks and immerse myself in online research as I hope to start a psychology degree in September too :)

 

[Upside Down Eagle]

I feel like sending you a truck of hugs Laurie. Respect to you for dealing with it, you're on the right track.

 

[Deleted member 20280]

LOL..... you shall forever be known as Radish!

 

[Namenotdiagnosis]

Really well done am proud of you. A big hug from me too. Keep fighting, coping but most of all keep smiling . There's people that care for you Laurie that's really important you know that. I wish you success. X

 

[Suzetig]

How incredibly brave - I'm the same age and have not experienced half what you have. i'm still caught by shame and fear which even now stops me being open. I wish you every good thing for your recovery

 

[Deleted member 28403]

You are amazing! You survived all of that! I feel ashamed for being so weak... Your story is so full of pain, sending you all the :hug:s!

 

[billie]

You're writing is powerful. Sending you (((hugs)))if you accept.

 

[sun seeker]

You survived all of that! I feel ashamed for being so weak...

Hey @otakujome... you survived too. And continue to survive. Validating someone else's experience doesn't invalidate your own.

Laurie (I don't want to tag you anymore because I know you want to change your screen name) I don't want to "like" this post but thank you for sharing. I'm inspired by all the recent changes you've made and your commitment to healing from this nightmare.

 

[littlelostchild]

Hugs, Laurie! Your strength and determination are a tremendous model for so many of us here. I am here for you on your journey.

:hug: Little