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Life better get better

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Luigiii

Learning
There’s this trend going around of ‘younger you seeing you now (in the bad state) giving up on dreams’ …….
I was 7 when I prayed to god to give my parents a new child so they wouldn’t hurt as bad when i would die….
I am 16 years old now and every year on my birthday im surprised to still be alive.
Yes i am a child but younger me was also struggling. I hate it when older people tell me ‘enjoy this time because this will be the best time of your life’ because they have no idea what I’ve been through. I hate the imagination that it will get worse from here on so i promised myself to not dream those stupid dreams anymore, i got one simple wish: one day i will wake up and be happy. I don’t care how, when or where, but one day and from that day on i will be able to say that I’m doing good and not have to lie.
My life has been an absolute wreck (especially recently) so I’m already kind of gratefull that I have not attempted recently (that’s already enough improvement for myself rn and im proud of that)
One day I will get better (and if that doesn’t happen at least I’ll have a good plot for a book lol)
 
Sounds almost identical to me at 16. It does get better. Be kind to yourself, even now, so that when better things come you can make good choices. Position yourself for the future you want, mentally and emotionally.

God kept you alive for a reason.
 
Sounds almost identical to me at 16. It does get better. Be kind to yourself, even now, so that when better things come you can make good choices. Position yourself for the future you want, mentally and emotionally.

God kept you alive for a reason.
Im so sorry, life is so hard. Thank you and bless you 💖
 
I hate it when older people tell me ‘enjoy this time because this will be the best time of your life’
Oh, yeah...I totally agree! I remember people who had absolutely no clue saying that, and it always made me mad.

one day i will wake up and be happy.
It's good that you have hope. I'm wondering if you are dong anything right now to help you get there?
 
At a recent birthday celebration for me my 6 year old grandson asked me, "Nana, how old are you?" My son quickly scolded him and said, "You never ask a lady her age!" I jumped in to reassure them both that his question was fine to ask. I wanted him to know my age and that right now every year my life gets better and better. I can now look around the room at the family I created and realize that the "shattered, broken person" (how I was described as an 18 year old) no longer exists. Life is far from perfect, but I am no longer shattered and I am definitely no longer broken. Wow! The bad guys did not win!
 
Yep. Life gets better. And worse. And more amazing than I could have dreamed. And more terrible than I knew to fear.

My mood plays a helluva lot into both.

If I’m in a shit mood, it doesn’t matter how brilliant my life or the moment is. I miss out on it, because pain.

If I’m in a great mood, things can be pure hell, but I’m laughin or excited or kicking ass.

^^^ It’s an incredibly vexing thing, because there are times when I have everything going for me, but I was happier/stronger/more clever, locked in a concrete box. Which is NOT to say I prefer the box. Ever. For any reason. I absolutely do not. What I very strongly prefer is the chutzpah, and determination, and sense of self I had, even when things were f*cking hard.

When I DO have all of my oomph! AND life is wicked good? That’s when things get reeeeally amazing.

So, for me, there are 4 pieces that kind of Tetris about. 3:4 means things are good. Good things are great, hard things are better, and daaaayum amazing? Happens. But if I lose my grit and things are hard? Shrug. Lost in the pain.
 
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