Hi Sally,
I'm really sorry to hear what you're going through, it sounds really hard.
I have chosen the non-med route personally. I decided to because I really didn't like the side effects (made me exhausted and exhaustion at the time would make me feel a little bit suicidal - no energy to carry on almost), I was worried that it would make me feel worse (as felt I was at rock bottom personally) and also I have read that meds can dull your joy and positive feelings as well as the negative - and I didn't want that. I was having a very hard time at this point and would keep a box in my draw just in case I decided I needed to.
I started acupuncture around the same time and started seeing a counsellor who specialised in PTSD. I also started eating properly (as was struggling to eat and think this was why it was so so bad, as low blood sugar and low calories can seriously f*ck with your mental health). This started with getting three meals a day and getting enough calories from relatively okay sources.
Next, I bought a juicer and cut out processed food and sugar. I have relapsed a bit - but this has seriously helped me SO MUCH. I also eat regularly: in order to have balanced blood sugar, and balanced, stable, happy moods - you need to eat regularly (every two-three hours), eat the right foods (high in nutrients and a balance of fat, protein and carbs) and make sure you get enough calories. I really, really feel that this is so important: if I don't eat regularly I veer into anxiety and depression, so I carry healthy snacks such as apples and almond butter, veggies and humus, or nut and date bars.
Sugar and processed foods are just going to make me feel depressed and anxious... i personally feel like i have to cut them out totally (i still have fun baking homemade pizza and cakes sweetened with a little fruit or honey) as they are not worth the depression and anxiety they cause, eating this way has really boosted my energy and wellbeing - I had an urge to skip along the path in the park today, I was feeling so good. Also, it can seem like deprivation but i actually get super excited about finding new recipes, cooking and baking. I still eat pizza - I can bake my own with a wholemeal base and sugar free pepperoni and I feel like I actually FEEL excited and energised by what I want to eat (rather than just a momentary 'blip' of happiness followed by a quick crash when I eat junk). Also giving myself the right nutrients - juicing really boosts my energy and wellbeing - I juice greens and fruit (green juice is a big mood boost) and I eat lots of veggies and low sugar fruit. This diet really helps me feel awesome - yes, I have up and down days - but I feel far happier, more at peace and just so much more stable. Whereas the junk food just causes an emotional PTSD rollercoaster. I guess for me food is my meds... and it's hard sometimes (probably impossible for some people) but I hope that I will be able to maintain it and that it will get easier to do once I get into the swing (still navigating social situations!) I also think some people are naturally a lot more negatively effected by sugar and processed junk food: I've always been a sugar fiend and a massive binger growing up. Sugar and processed stuff is so addictive to me and really f*cks with my food.
Exercise also helps a lot... I just started 15 minutes of yoga each morning, followed by a Somatic Experiencing grounding exercise (think the book is called 'Overcoming Trauma' by Peter Levine, where he teaches you a series of different SA techniques). I also love dancing. I read anything that grounds you in your body and the present is super helpful for trauma and both of these things make me feel safe and grounded, yet free in my own body (which I realise I really haven't felt since my traumas).
Also, acupuncture is very, very calming and grounding. I think it seems to help me process things and makes things feel lighter. I've really been trying to find the science behind this (I am skeptical about anything unless it's backed by science...) but for some reason this just really seems to work. And all the people there are just so lovely and chilled out: I always think a good way to assess how affective something is by seeing the mental and emotional states of the people who do that thing :). I've heard lots of good things about it for PTSD and anxiety and really think it helps me personally.
I also have found counselling helpful, my PTSD counsellor is really helpful and it helps a lot to talk to someone who actually gets it. I'm booked in for Rewind and CBT with them... so hoping it can only get better.
Other things: I make sure I manage my stress well, as obviously this is a big part of PTSD. Bad (and good stress) can 'overflow' your PTSD cup. So I work part time and take lots of me time and quiet time (I guess I am lucky that I am not in a super busy or stressful situation such as a hectic work or family life, but I hope I can factor this in when I do have those things). I make sure I have a relaxation inducing environment: I use headphones, earplugs, I listen a white noise soundtrack (rain water - I have a good app on my iPhone, it really calms me and I put it on to shut out annoying outside noises), I have a humidifier that I use essential oils with - lavender is the main one I use, it's soooooo calming and I read an interesting study that it reduces anxiety and sleep disturbances in people with PTSD (I also inhale some when I'm feeling anxious!). I also fill my room with plants - there are many studies on the calming effects of plants and their power to relax and drop blood pressure - I find sitting in a room full of plants very calming. I also do a 30 second cold water blast in the shower (I read a study which said it's helpful for depression) which really boosts my energy and mood... I also walk dogs part time, which is very calming and great companionship.
For sleep I take valerian and passion flower... they are both very. very helpful - I have been taking them at high doses and they knock me out but i worry about longterm safety so I am reading more about sleep hygiene and hoping to ease off of them.
I'm also trying to build a supportive friendship group, that doesn't revolve around partying, drinking, smoking and eating junk food... coz I don't really want to be doing any of that while I'm in recovery. So I hope to join a dance, kickboxing class and go to a meditation class regularly where I can meet supportive people. As I know that a strong social life is really important for good mental health and wellbeing.
So, this has been what I've been doing. I was in a very bad place before all this: couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, very bad, VERY hyper vigilant, depressed, ongoing panic/doomy feelings, feeling like I might be going crazy, feeling frightened and on edge, not sure what was happening and what would happen to my mind. Now I know most of that was just the anxiety caused by the PTSD, I still get it and still feel frightened sometimes and depressed occasionally, but just knowing what it is has helped so much... I think I can't overemphasise the value of having a counsellor who specialises in PTSD - it is VITAL. You need someone to tell you you are not crazy, that it's 'just' PTSD basically. This. And diet has been massive (I think that I was SO bad because I wasn't eating enough or healthily and this was leading me not to sleep and both of these led to me feeling out of control - physical health is so, so important). And the acupuncture has been a big help too. It's definitely very possible to manage your PTSD in a holistic way (but I can only speak from my own experience, some people may be worse than me, no matter how bad I felt - meds can be right :), but we just have to find what works for us).