Lost, Looking For Help

[sassy]

My name is sassy, I have been in an online relationship with a gentleman for over a year. He suffers from PTSD. He is a combat veteran. He had been taking medications and therapy before I met him, however he stopped. Recently the stress form thins goin on in his life, as well as the stress in my life caused him to have a breakdown.

He has started threapy again, the doctor has started him on meds again. The therapist has told him he needs to limit his contact with people online as well as people in his real life until the medicine kicks in. My question, what do I do?

I love this man with my entire heart and soul, but because of current situations I can't be with him in real life just yet. I'm scared that I will loose him. Don't get me wrong, I think it is wonderful he is getting the help he needs, I told him that I will be there for him, and I will wait for him forever if I have to. I'm just scared. Any advice?

 

[intothelight]

Hi Sassy,

Welcome to the PTSD Forum. There is an entire section here for Supporters who's loved one has PTSD. My first suggestion to you would be to read all that you can. My second suggestions is to take care of yourself. Relationships are tough, and PTSD brings with it a whole other dimension of challenges.

Wishing you the best.
Debbie

 

[Army_Brat_88]

I told him that I will be there for him, and I will wait for him forever if I have to

Sassy - my whole situation is out there on this site. I can only say do NOT make this promise. What it does is enable them and could backfire in them getting help. Many have said that line before you, and they are no longer on this site.

There are a bunch of us who have said the "love him with our whole heart" line, however, unless HE really seeks the treatment he needs, this will not be enough.

I can only tell you that most likely he's nowhere near ready for a relationship. Many on this site have combat ppl in their lives where signs seem to point to it. It doesn't make them bad people at all, it just makes them people who are emotionally not able to commit themselves as much as needed. Be ready for that, because it means you will most likely have to carry the entire load until they are able, and if you feel you can handle that everyday for months, perhaps years, then go for it.

I don't say any of this to be mean, if it's meant to be it will be, however you need to be very realistic on the possible outcomes also. Don't pretend, and don't excuse.

AB

 

[Sandra]

Welcome to the forum. :)

 

[sassy]

Thank you for the welcomes. He was my rock when I needed him the most, and I intend to be the same for him. It has been around three years that he has had a really bad PTSD, for lack of correct term and I apologize if it's incorrect, episode. He made the decision himself to return to treatment. I am ready to do whatever it takes to help him, I told him that we would take it slow, day by day. That's all I can do.