Major Changes At Work

[whiteraven]

I don't deal with change very well, esp. when it directly affects me in a negative way.

I found out today (by way of email from one of my co-workers since I'm off) that there are some major changes at work. One of the girls in another department is getting a management position in mine; she knows nothing about the department and she is *mean*.

On top of that, I did something major to my knee/leg today and I can barely walk. It's been bothering me for a couple of months (I DID tell my doctor and he told me to "push through" the pain) but today I twisted it wrong and heard a loud crack - and the pain was intense. I've been icing it for several hours and it's still killing me.

So...we have the change at work (which our manager did not tell me about, even though I am lower management and she told the other person who is in a similar position to mine) and the worry on top of it that I may need to take off several days. Lots of anxiety, too, about being out of the loop. This company is so secretive about *everything* - I worry all the time about being fired, although they follow a pretty standard pattern when firing people. Even if I'm safe in that regard, I am worried about working under this woman.

 

[SabrinaFair]

I can offer empathy, I work for a person who has some sort of MH issues as well. She's fine one day, then will stop talking to me for a day and be really nasty at times. I also have trouble with change. The company moved us to a new location after giving us 3 weeks notice. My supervisor wouldn't tell me anything about the new location, the set up, or anything, and stopped talking to me for a month. We moved to an area very closed to where I used to live and very serious trauma occurred. I moved from an office to a cubicle, was afraid that people would be walking behind me and that the new noise level would cause problems. I have also been fired several times due to attendance and mistakes at work and am constantly worried I will be fired again.
The only thing I do is to make sure that I remind myself constantly that my boss the one with the problem. She is the one everyone talks about and empathizes with me about. I also have managed to divorce myself from the idea that if a person is mad, that means I did something wrong.
It has taken time to get used to the new location, and every time I make a mistake or the contract ends, I'm terrified of not having a job. To combat this, I remind myself that it is just a job. There are more out there and I've always made do. It may not be what I want to deal with, but I'm progressing all of the time. I used to be upper management and spent all of my time at work. Now I have a good work/life balance, I'm sleeping without medication for the first time in 8 years. I still get seriously frustrated, and progress is slow, but it is progress.

 

[whiteraven]

She's fine one day, then will stop talking to me for a day and be really nasty at times.

Sounds exactly like mine.

The only thing I do is to make sure that I remind myself constantly that my boss the one with the problem.

I try. But getting beaten down every single day makes it really hard. It's always been like that for me. And I am not meek or shy. I speak up for myself. But it never seems to matter.

It has taken time to get used to the new location, and every time I make a mistake or the contract ends, I'm terrified of not having a job.

I totally get this! I've been let go from 2 jobs, not because my work was bad, but because of the depression and PTSD symptoms. I constantly worry about being fired because I honestly don't think I could get another one that pays what I currently make. I have a home and to lose it would be devastating.

Thank you @SabrinaFair

 

[whiteraven]

So...the last two days have been awful. I haven't SI'ed in a long time and this, this brought it back. My department was kept completely out of the decisions - and just the information - about the changes. Seems so many other people knew, but not the people they were going to directly affect.

It feels really bad. I'm sad and angry and really anxious. Anxious because I am sure there are more changes coming but I'm also sure we will not know until they've occurred. I feel like I want to die. I know. Everybody says to get a new job. It's not that easy. It's hard to find anything that makes what I currently make, or find similar benefits. I'm also pretty sure I won't be able to manage an interview or stay with any company I might work for. I just don't have the kind of skills people need, I'm old, and I'm really messed up. It feels overwhelming and hopeless.

 

[Friday]

Would taking a weeks vacation/ sick leave/ PTO help? Some time to get your feet under you, wrap your mind around changes coming down the pipes, rather than sitting there worried about changes coming?

 

[whiteraven]

Would taking a weeks vacation/ sick leave/ PTO help? Some time to get your feet under you, wrap your mind around changes coming down the pipes, rather than sitting there worried about changes coming?

I'm actually afraid to take any time off right now. Everything feels very precarious. I would love to take a week, but I wouldn't put it past them to move me out of my position and put someone else in it.

 

[Justmehere]

Noticing what doesn’t change helps me get through what does change.