Make it stop!

[Deleted member 44517]

How do you get the images to stop? The thoughts? I am in physical/emotional hell right now. I hurt! I can't get this shit out of head. I need relief that doesn't come from a bottle.

 

[user44376]

I try to use CBT techniques. Meditation. Watch something. Music. Anything to distract. Weed is my medicine. I don’t like booze.

Hell, I’ve even masturbated just to get my mind on something else. It’s temp but it may be enough to bring down that feverish thought stream.

Wish you luck. I know the feeling.

 

[Deleted member 37474]

My T prefers I go a preventative route by avoiding the things that cause these reactions. I guess once there, I have to ride it out best I can. Grounding. Walk the dog, hang out with my friend. Draw in my journal. Write it out.

 

[Chem Lady]

It's a really hard thing to deal with. I don't think I have any helpful advice for you. But I understand the overwhelming frustration with your brain doing things you can't control. It's so hard. I hope it helps a little that I get it and that I care.

 

[recoveringfromptsd]

For me it took going to sheppard pratt's trauma disorders unit to learn how to deal with the overwhelming thoughts and images.

But I can pass along some of what I learned and maybe it will help.

Try using frozen oranges or lemons for grounding, the coldness consumes your attention away from the trauma images/thoughts.
Use mental imagery to replace the images and thoughts, things like imagining a special safe place and mentally retreating to it. For me it was a real place in a real point in time. I would go mentally to that safe place, and visit those I knew there. The latter part consumes a lot of my attention, and unfocuses me from the trauma. There are other techniques, like focusing on objects, I have grounding objects all over my home. So that if I get triggered, I can just look up and have something to focus on to get grounded. I also have a clock that ticks and has a second hand. The sound and movement both I can use to get grounded.

Ironically, before I went to sheppard pratt so many on this forum used the word "grounding" trying to help me. I only understood it loosely, but after being at SP I understood it well.

 

[Freida]

Most effective is to write it out -- gets it out of my head for a while
music - as loud as I can stand it. Use headphones so the neighbors don't call the cops
walk the dog

weird but effective...
color - found an app for my tablet
cartoons or really stupid movies. Just enough to keep me distracted without having to think
ice pack on the back of my neck. I got this idea from a combat vet. He says it slows blood flow to your head. works amazingly - I just keep forgetting to do it
talk to them and ask them to go away. Yea as in have a conversation. It doesn't always work, but it can help me focus on what I'm thinking. It's kind of like backwards meditation

My favorite....
Spend way to many hours on this site to reassure myself I'm not alone in this :hug:

 

[Deleted member 44517]

You guys are great.
I have been more symptomatic over the last six months than the last six years. I don't know what's going on but I realize I am ill equipped to deal with it. I can't get the images of torture and the fears of my children being harmed out of my head.

Music turned out to be the best distraction yesterday. It's amazing how I can't actually come up with anything on my own when I'm panicking. I fear sleep now and so I guess I'm still needing a drink to help get me there. There is no better time for my mind to go wild with no relief than in the middle of the night.

A coworker today mentioned to me that I might have too much stress in my life right now and maybe I should cut back on stuff.

Hysterical.

It's like trying to choose which child to keep. Most everything is a responsibility, not a hobby.

 

[Freida]

Are you doing the therapy thing? If not now might be a good time to look into it - try to get on top of the symptoms before they get worse

Co worker is right -- stress makes it worse. I'm guessing dumping duties is inconceivable right now, but planning to dump them might give you some distraction and eventually, a new way of doing things in the future.

 

[Deleted member 44517]

I have asked for a cut back in hours at work. Boss won't consider it until after the holidays.

I am in therapy. I guess I'm just kind of obtuse. I don't seem to really pick up any good coping strategies. It all falls out of my head. I'm working on it.

She handed me her copy of the DBT workbook. So, I guess that was her saying " do some of these things"!

 

[Freida]

It all falls out of my head.

yep. it does! That's why they keep repeating the same stupid crapola over and over. Eventually it sorta sinks in. I have all my coping tools written down in a list I see every time I open my computer it because ...wait for it... I'm going to forget every single one when I get panicky or flashbacky or can't cope. But even on bad days I always open my laptop at some point - and look! There are my reminders of what I'm supposed to do when I'm freaking out. If I had to rely on my memory I'd be totally screwed.

The only thing I can think about when it starts is how to escape - but you can't escape your own head. So the easily found reminders are a lifesaver (yes I mean that literally). And - if it gets really bad I jump on this site and do exactly what you did --- ask for help from those who know.

 

[user44376]

I haven’t read much about DBT so I can’t comment, but I do know that CBT is exhausting.
It’s a constant vigil. It’s highly-demanding and requires complete commitment.

I think it’s such a ball-breaker because it actually does work. Even now at what I can only hope is as close to my worst as I’ll ever get, CBT still helps. I spent years reading about it then saw a CBT therapist when I got on disability. I have a good reflexive cache of coping techniques to fall back on. But still, those are for when it gets bad, and even then I’m not always successful. Trying to rewire completely is beyond me at this point. I don’t have the energy.

Your coworker sounds like the template for every insincere, uncaring and ignorant dick I’ve ever come across. As much as they piss me off I can’t imagine living a life so shallow, empty and idiotic that just “cutting back on things” will take your troubles away. I’d rather be nuts.

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

@jael :hug:

I fear sleep now and so I guess I'm still needing a drink to help get me there. There is no better time for my mind to go wild with no relief than in the middle of the night.

Maybe you could try take Benadryl to help you get to sleep? (generic is diphenhydramine) Unless you are one of the people who get hyper on it instead of sleepy. It is usually the first thing docs recommend when asked for something to help with sleep. It isn't addictive at all.

You also might consider writing yourself a letter, or write on a note card that you keep close by for the times when you can't think of your coping mechanisms. I have the same problem. It all disappears when the stress goes from 0-100 in an instant!

I have a letter that I can read when I am feeling like I really want out of life...It isn't an option...EVER...but the letter helps ground me. In it I list "my people", the ones who love me, and that I love far too much to put them through the loss of me...