• 💖 [Donate To Keep MyPTSD Online] 💖 Every contribution, no matter how small, fuels our mission and helps us continue to provide peer-to-peer services. Your generosity keeps us independent and available freely to the world. MyPTSD closes if we can't reach our annual goal.

Mental Imagery Study With Dr. Robert Roerich

Status
Not open for further replies.
After effects of Interview

I wasn't sure where to put this, so I'm putting this here.

I feel void. Totally void. I know that can't be because I'm sighing every three seconds (sign of anxiety), very jumpy about my door, the phone, anyone talking to me etc., and I'm exhausted but I can't sleep. Yet, I would describe it as void. An empty space. No more than a shell covering nothingness. The thought of attempting to write down all the stuff from the interview is more than I can even think about. Moving it is more than I can think about. Breathing is as far as I get right now. It took me five hours to make a pot of tea. Matt made supper. we had turkey sandwhiches. pretty god damn sad.

I feel void. Void like my past. Void like the years I am missing from my amnesia. ....

bec
 
well I've gone from void, to exceptional anger.. ohhh am I ever angry right now.. all day so far.. I'm pissed at my brain, I'm pissed at the justice system, the health care system, my lack of support, my trauma, my inablity to deal with it, at some of my secrets coming out.. at my unreasonable beliefs that I know are unreasonable that I don't want to talk about because I know they are unreasonable although my brain refuses to listen, at the entire planet, society, pissed at men, relationships, my mother.. i could keep going..

Wow, this hit nerves.. great big ones.

bec
 
I will agree with you. This does send you all over and back to poking at shit you thought you were done with... Funny thing is you are the one poking it, not another person.
 
Just don't forget to poke it with reason, find sense to it all, and deal with things, instead of just putting them back in their place with negative stigma attached.
 
I will remove you from the list LRS.

One position still available then... and maybe others, as we only have 4... maybe 5 I think, disclaimers back.
 
cathy's mental imagery

it seems i always go to the same place, a lot of my answers were about the same as the mental imagery with anthony. it is easy, and although i was pretty nervous, it was really nothing to worry about. Dr. R was very nice.

i learned i have issues with trust, not knowing who to trust. i learned i am healing(yay!)i am evidently confused about a lot, i'm not sure about that, i'll have to try and figure it out. one thing i definately don't understand is the anger towards authority. i really don't have any trouble with that in my job, maybe i was angry with my parents, but i don't really remember much anger, more puzzlement and sadness.

gave me some things to explore with my therapist, if i can manage. i think i gave myself a headache, trying to figure out what to write here. he pointed out that my mood is better/worse, which is the depression, i guess. when it's not bad, i am hopeful, when it is bad, i feel hopeless.
 
I really want to participate...just nervous

I feel like "WOW...I am participating in the mental imagery study this weekend with Dr. Roerich!" I am becoming more and more anxious as the study approaches. Why? Well,on the one hand, I'm anxious to participate and can't wait to get the ball rolling...find out more about myself and work on possible solutions to get better. On the other hand, I don't know if I can deal with what the study may reveal. I'm not very good with words and try to hide my inadequecies the best I know how in order to survive and hang on to my job, husband, etc. Do I want anyone to see the real me? Yes, I really do. Do I know who I am anymore? No, not really.
 
i have done nothing but sleep the last few days, lol. but sleep i needed. i feel different somehow, not sure if it was the mental imagery or the sleep. it feels more like i know who i am than i did before, maybe its self-esteem coming up? i don't know. i really think it is the combination of things, but i am grateful that i feel this way. i still don't understand everything, lol, but i am still working on it.
cathy
 
Theresa, simply detail here what you found, what your experience was, what you learnt about yourself (if anything), etc.
 
Nice, half way there... just another five people to go. For those above who have expressed interest, we will commence the process soon, thus all five of you will be partaking in this, and I thank you for it. You won't be sorry, let me just say that.


I would love to try this. i am only skeptical because i am not great at computers. I need to get a mic and camers.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top