My friend with ptsd

[Lavenderlady11]

Hi hope I'm posting in the right section
I've recently become friends with a guy who has ptsd and a history of childhood sexual abuse I really like him and want to grow closer to him as a friend but I'm scared of coming on too strong I think he might have an avoidant attachment personality or something similar to that I asked him a week ago some standard questions like his favorite things and he didn't respond after a week I still didn't hear from him so I asked why and told him if he doesn't want to talk to me let me know and I'll leave him alone he responded saying my last message totally stressed him out so I'm wondering if I should expect to get closer to him in the future or should I just only write once in while so I don't stress him out ? I have to give him credit even after he said that's the reason why he didn't answer my questions he then gave me the answers and we carried on a small conversation back n forth do you think me and him could maybe become guinine friends ? Any feedback would be greatly appreciated thanks bye for now !

 

[Justmehere]

I asked why and told him if he doesn't want to talk to me let me know and I'll leave him alone he responded saying my last message totally stressed him out so I'm wondering if I should expect to get closer to him in the future or should I just only write once in while so I don't stress him out ?

You don't have to answer, but I am curious as to what was your last question?

I would suggest to slow way down, don't send multiple contacts without a response, and keep it light. In the end, it may not develop into more of a friendship for reasons that may or may not have to do with PTSD, and that's ok. Keep investing in developing other friendships too.

 

[Lavenderlady11]

Hi the last question I sent him was actually three questions I asked him what were some of his favorite movies and TV shows did he have any hobbies and what his favorite color was and that he said stressed him out so I'm trying from now on to be more careful about what I say to him and as far as friendship goes that's all I'm expecting or looking for just friendship nothing else he said he doesn't mind talking and he said it doesn't have to be a light conversation he says he's ok with taking about more uncomfortable topics he didn't mind me putting him on my close friends list but then again he could have just not wanted to be rude anyway I'm hoping we can become good friends

 

[Chris-duck]

I'm curious, how did you end up with a friend, where you know he has PTSD, but don't know if he has any hobbies? Like how did that come about? Seems pretty early on in a friendship to consider him a close friend, or to seek support from a forum over.

 

[Lavenderlady11]

I'm curious, how did you end up with a friend, where you know he has PTSD, but don't know if he has any hobbies? Like how did that come about? Seems pretty early on in a friendship to consider him a close friend, or to seek support from a forum over.

Because he is kind of in the public eye and he's told his story alot he mentioned he has ptsd we also got to talking because both of us are survivors of childhood sexual abuse and he is someone who offers support to others who have gone through this so I just wanted to get to know him better were friends on Instagram and we just chat back n forth once in awhile

 

[Justmehere]

Keep in mind that if you have never met in person, he may not be who he is on social media. People put their best fake selves on social media. You are kind of coming in like an interviewer and are spending a lot of time on what might be a distant online friendship. Go lightly, and back up on the questions, and maybe instead share light information about yourself. Keep it light. See if he responds and reciprocates.