Hi Friends,
My boyfriend deployed to Iraq last week. During transit he contacted me telling me how much he missed me, how he couldn't have asked for a better woman, told his friends about us, promised me a trip to Mexico when he comes back and also said while we are there, he has something very important he wants to tell me (i'm thinking engagement), he finally arrived there caught up on his sleep and we were communicating by instant messenger during this time.
I promised him always that I would wait for him, be loyal, be productive, be strong and positive while he was gone. So I have been doing just that, I've been working, going to Bikram yoga, going to the gym, and just doing my best to stay healthy mind body and soul in order to cope better with his absence. This is our 3rd deployment.
Well, this will sound wierd but, I felt that pit in my stomach before he even contacted me....the pit that tells me he has been triggered and when we finally instant messaged....he said there was a problem.....and he accused me of cheating on him. He is convinced that I cheated on him. I asked him who is filling his head with this garbage? He has completely villainized me. I have been nothing but dedicated to him. I am a loyal person by nature, but also I am so in love with this man that no other man could ever interest me. Ive never given him a reason to think twice about my loyalty. He told me to get away from him and shut down the instant message.
We have 3 months ahead and I'm helpless. Hes lost in that world over there and I can't defend myself see him, talk to him, nothing...he's unreachable. I'm shattered. Absolutely shattered. I can't call anyone to talk because I feel this is all in his head and I want to protect him and not taint anyone's perception of him or me. I don't want to allow this negativity to snatch away a beautiful relationship. He's my heart. I love him. I love him. I would never hurt him.
My boyfriend deployed to Iraq last week. During transit he contacted me telling me how much he missed me, how he couldn't have asked for a better woman, told his friends about us, promised me a trip to Mexico when he comes back and also said while we are there, he has something very important he wants to tell me (i'm thinking engagement), he finally arrived there caught up on his sleep and we were communicating by instant messenger during this time.
I promised him always that I would wait for him, be loyal, be productive, be strong and positive while he was gone. So I have been doing just that, I've been working, going to Bikram yoga, going to the gym, and just doing my best to stay healthy mind body and soul in order to cope better with his absence. This is our 3rd deployment.
Well, this will sound wierd but, I felt that pit in my stomach before he even contacted me....the pit that tells me he has been triggered and when we finally instant messaged....he said there was a problem.....and he accused me of cheating on him. He is convinced that I cheated on him. I asked him who is filling his head with this garbage? He has completely villainized me. I have been nothing but dedicated to him. I am a loyal person by nature, but also I am so in love with this man that no other man could ever interest me. Ive never given him a reason to think twice about my loyalty. He told me to get away from him and shut down the instant message.
We have 3 months ahead and I'm helpless. Hes lost in that world over there and I can't defend myself see him, talk to him, nothing...he's unreachable. I'm shattered. Absolutely shattered. I can't call anyone to talk because I feel this is all in his head and I want to protect him and not taint anyone's perception of him or me. I don't want to allow this negativity to snatch away a beautiful relationship. He's my heart. I love him. I love him. I would never hurt him.
