Need Help With Dissociation

[sarahscott92]

I am new to this forum and was wondering if anyone had any suggestions for dealing with dissociation. It tends to present itself at the most inconvenient times (i.e. driving to school, walking to class). My therapist suggested grounding techniques such as labeling my surroundings but that hasn't worked at all. Loud music has helped in the past but recently I've been delving into some pretty serious trauma work (in therapy) and music is no longer bringing me back to reality. Please, if you can, provide me with any methods or techniques that have helped you guys... I'd really, REALLY appreciate it.

 

[Jane.l]

Hi - I struggle with this too - sometimes strong smells like lemon grass can help. In therapy getting up walking around or swapping chairs can help. If you needed to get away at the time of trauma actually getting up and walking away with your T just down the hallway or whatever can be helpful . If you are zoning out to avoid whatever your T wants to talk about a complete change of subject and turning the focus on him not me gives me the space to 'come back' . Sorry no big life changing ideas in that lot but hope something may help a little .

 

[sarahscott92]

Thanks for the response! Much appreciated

 

[Casper1018]

I read something once that helps me. The article said turn your head and look left then right, this will get your brain out of flight/fright/freeze mode. Then, engage your 5 senses. Find something to smell, focus on with your eyes, listen to, etc. By noticing and engaging with your environment, it will stop the dissociation. I have started doing this and it really helps me. Hope it helps you, too!

 

[NovemberStar]

I think your ability to be able to become grounded / stop being dissociated depend on why you are dissociating to begin with - ie, I very much believe it depends on the type of trauma you experienced.

For me, I cannot tolerate ANY form of 'grounding' in any of the main ways other people seem to be able to. This is ESPECIALLY true for me when I am with or around other people. In therapy is the worst place and thankfully neither my pdoc or my T will ever even try to "help" me ground. Why? Because I am dissociating because I feel absolutely UNSAFE in the present. I am dissociating BECAUSE I'm with other people - 'grounding' me or 'helping' be come back to the present makes the dissociation worse. Something about that situation left me so unsafe I second in the only way I knew how - if I felt unsafe being there (and therefore dissociated) it makes no sense at all, to 'come back' until I am ready.

I don't think it will always be like that. My pdoc said I'm simply too traumatised yet - but as I work the my traumas, I do expect I will become more tolerable in 'being with' others while in a highly distressed state. My key trauma was child abuse at the hands of my caregivers - my T tells me it's perfectly understandable I'd struggle the most with emotional intimacy and feeling safe, when in the midst of dealing with this.

I don't know what yr trauma was - but if it related to being abused or made unsafe in the presence of people you trusted deeply and then they hurt you in unexpected ways, it would make sense you don't necessarily feel safe enough to 'ground' when around other people.

On the other hand - at the very roots, dissociation is a symptom of severe anxiety. Do you find you are triggered and then dissociate? Is it being at school that is triggering the increased anxiety? Or something particular about driving?

To a certain extent, people who don't have PTSD dissociate while walking or driving. They daydream / space out. Mis it I referring with your life badly?

Some techniques I've heard that work for other people:

Snapping a rubber around your wrist. Ie wear it around your wrist and when you need to ground yourself, pull it so it pings back. A similar one is using a block of ice to hold in yr hand.

It sounds like you've done the 'naming things in your environment' - my old T used to say it's important to focus in the different senses - ie, name 5 things you SEE, 5 this you HEAR, 5 things you SMELL.

Saying a phrase over an over "it is all ok, I'm not going mad, it's just anxiety" or "I am safe".

When I'm alone I try these things (when having a panic attack). I lie down in the ground on my stomach. The firmness of the ground leaves me feeling safe.

I also hide under a blanket.

I go to sleep. My body takes over and I am hit with sudden exhaustion and HAVE to SLEEP. Yet I'm sleep with my eyes closed but mentally alert. I can't move or open my eyes, but I feel very calm.


Other coping strategies I use for anxiety: watching tv; being online; I especially find listening to online program's calming (Dr Phil!!) while I'm doing some other activity (paperwork or dishes)

I also find colouring in / doodling / scribbling helps.

Having a shower and washing my hair.

Changing the sheets on my bed - heavenly to climb into bed after a hard day mentally, with the smell and feeling of clean fresh sheets!

Hope some of those ideas might help. Remember - dissociation is not you 'going mad' - it's 'just' a symptom of anxiety :) (Not trying to invalidate your distress - I just know for me it helps to remind myself that when when I'm dissociating - because I start thinking I'm going mad and then the fear and anxiety REALLY takes off - and round in cycles I go).

 

[Kefira]

I have a homemade weighted blanket I use at home. A lot of the standard things therapists suggest do thankfully work for me, but I also use things like aromatherapy. I have a diffuser at home and carry a small oil vial in my purse. I have a bracelet made of shungite, and even if you don't believe in crystals having properties something like that can be a good reminder like the old tying a string around your finger. I meditate too, so that helps and I also do mantra meditation. Since I've done it enough as soon as I start thinking my mantra in line at a store or during a conversation I find triggering I calm and ground some. I think eft, emotional freedom technique, is helpful on a number of levels and you can Google good instructions for it.

Just a few thoughts. Maybe something there will work or lead you to something that does

 

[passerine]

I love my weighted blanket and would definitely recommend buying (or making) one to use when dissociated at home. I only wish I could bring mine with me to therapy. Another thing I find useful is holding a frozen orange. The cold and the texture and the scent can help to bring me back. My therapist has Theraputty in his office, which has several different strengths, that I find helpful to hold and squeeze. At home, I find playing with clay to be really grounding. I also carry peppermint oil around with me; if you dab a little on your skin it creates a tingling sensation and also has a strong enough scent that it might help bring you back. They key, at least for me, is to fully engage your five senses. If I'm able, going for a walk or doing some gentle yoga poses while paying attention to my surroundings and sometimes naming the things that I see also helps bring me back into my body and the present moment.

Relentlessly practicing grounding techniques is what it takes for me. I hope you find something that works well for you, too.

 

[sarahscott92]

I want to thank all of you so much for your responses, I am definitely going to try the weighted blanket as well as the aromatherapy (using all five senses). I'm not sure if I'm posting correctly... But I just really wanted to express my gratitude for all of the support you've provided. I've recently felt as though it's impossible for me to relate to others, in part, because of my extensive history of trauma. I'm so glad that there I've found a place where I can speak honestly about my struggle with cPTSD. I've never experienced this type of comfort/support outside of therapy and it truly warms my heart.

Again, many thanks.

 

[Bubblegirl]

I'd never hear of the turning your head thing. Thanks for posting, going to tey it!

 

[EmmaDancing]

Like some people here have already said, frozen oranges help a lot, and a similar thing that helps me is either drinking or washing my hands in really hot water. You mentioned dissociating whilst driving/going places; maybe it would help to carry a waterbottle-type thing with really hot fragrant tea in it; that way you get both smell, touch, and taste for sensory grounding. Another sensory thing that works for me is gum - I tend to carry around a lot of gum for when I start dissociating. Hope this helped :)