Relationship Neglected And Neglecting?

[Grasshoppa]

hello everyone I am new to this so take it easy on me. I am girl friend to a lovely guy that has PTSD, we have only been dating for 5 months. This guy is everything to me, he has always treated me like his queen. But now his ptsd has kicked in and he has kicked me out his life he will not text or return calls now. He told me he is trying hard to deal with his problems but I need to know it is not me. I feel so neglected right now and when I don't check on him for just one day even if he won't return the call or pick up, I feel like I am neglecting him. I am so sad on the inside. Someone please talk to me.

 

[Deleted member 541]

@Grasshoppa Hi..... Sorry that you're dealing with the aftermath of PTSD shitstorm. It's tough to be on the end of that stick. But...... being on the other end of that stick is worlds and worlds different from where you are. No one can understand what we go through when in full PTSD shit. No one, unless you have PTSD can possibly understand.

My suggestion.... Leave him alone, don't bother him, no txt no phone calls no email. Just let him be, give him his space for a few weeks and see what happens. If he doesn't contact you in 2 weeks, send him a text saying... Hi, hope you're doing ok and I'm here if you need. That's it, nothing more.

He needs space to deal with the shit he's going through. Know this is hard on you and I know you don't understand any of this, but just understand that it's way worse for us...... just try to be patient.....

 

[Grasshoppa]

@She Cat thank you so much for this I will do that from this day forward. I was just feeling like I was neglecting him if I did. But I do understand what you are saying. It will be hard for me and hurt like hell but i guess it needs to be done. But I won't lie part of me is wondering if he is using the PTsd to break up. I feel bad when I think like that. Oh boy I am so confused!

 

[Deleted member 541]

Sometimes the PTSD does come between relationships. I don't know what his trauma is, what type of therapy he has had, if any. If he has good coping skills? Support system??? All of this also has a direct impact on how he deals with the PTSD and relationships.

I'm sorry @Grasshoppa that anyone has to deal with this shit. It's tough on BOTH sides. Hang in there!! And take care of yourself!!!!!!

 

[Grasshoppa]

Sometimes the PTSD does come between relationships. I don't know what his trauma is, what type of therap...

Thank you so much I will do that

 

[Snowflakes]

@Grasshoppa In your first post you needed to know it's not you. It is not you. I have learned that, at least for me, the one who loves and cares for a PTSD sufferer seems to catch the most crap (for lack of a better word)

Stick around, read everything here, write when you need us, and write when you need to vent. We are in this boat together.

@She Cat gave awesome advice. Sometimes I forget what it must be like and I'm glad she reminded me that we are all in this together. As she said....Hang in there and take care of yourself.

 

[Grasshoppa]

@Grasshoppa In your first post you needed to know it's not you. It is not you. I...

Thank you so much @Snowflakes i am taking it one day at a time.