New Here, But Sadly Not New To Abuse...

[Brea]

I too was doing CBT and I ended up in the hospital. I was having flashbacks and panic attacks when I started therapy and then after two months I was dissociating so much I felt like I was lost. I ended up in the hospital. I met a doctor there after being shuffled around for over three months who finally understood me. Everyone else was treating me as if I had DID and an eating disorder when my new Psychiatrist met me and said I had C-PTSD and with that came certain identity fragmentation. He does a program called IRT which stands for interpersonal reconstructive therapy and it is actually helping. I have been doing it for 9 months now and it is a three year program. I am now starting to really feel a bit better. I still have flashbacks, dissociations and panic attacks but I feel more empowered. It's a good feeling. The other day, I pasted the names of my abusers on the bottom of my shoes and went for a run. Every time that foot hit the pavement it felt really good. Crazy I know, but so empowering.
Brea

 

[Blutarg]

Blutarg,
Well, I am an author of fiction mainly, but a few years ago I started to write my first non-fiction peice, it was to be my autobiography/memoirs, but I had a really terrifying breakdown and flashback period during the abuse part of the writing, so I stopped and never really went back to it. You are welcome to read what is written within that piece, yet I do warm you that it's extremely graphic and explicit in nature. If you send me a PM with your email I could forward a copy on to you. (bare in mind it is unfinished, never will be finished and is most likely full of mistakes!).

Scott
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My therapist said I should write a book because I write poem sort of things as a way of venting what I feel and he said that by doing so it will help me to face the parts that have been blocked out but each time I get to a part that will be graphic I get distracted or I just can't remember. Did you have this problem? I can understand the flashbacks and all the other problems that go with it. I get moody, irritable, can't sleep and have nightmares that are worse than the ones I normally get so I just stopped because it was just too much. I'll see if I can figure the site out and see if I can send you a message.

 

[WonderingWhy]

Scott,

Sorr about the delay, I just realized I never sent you a nice welcome. That is just not right.Link Removed So I apologize for the delay.

WELCOME! Link Removed

 

[suzie q]

Welcome Scott

Sorry for the delayed welcome, I just joined the other day but have seen your avatar before. Hope we can help each other heal through this forum.. suzie q