Ohhhh So Horrible, Having To Tell My Therapist About The Trauma

[Hashi]

piratelady, I'm regretting that I started another topic (all about me :oops:) in this thread. I'm really sorry to be such a pain, but I've seen you mention elsewhere that you're able to take posts out and make them into a new thread. Is it possible to do this here?

If it's possible, and if you'd be kind enough, could I ask you to move posts #33 - 39 inclusive, and #42, out and into a new thread called "No more money, no more therapy (for now)"? (Tags: therapy, money) I know they don't exactly stand alone, but maybe if you started it off with an edit or initial post saying "Moved here from another thread"

Is it OK to ask you to that? I should have done it like that in the first place. Apologies.

 

[piratelady]

I think I got it! :) Let me know if I missed something.

 

[Hashi]

piratelady, that's great. And impressive! Thank you very much. :)

Hope you're doing OK today.

 

[piratelady]

I am doing ok, for the most part. I find my thoughts are back to how they were before my appointment. I am just thinking about all the different times I was abused and trying to figure out how much of it I need to deal with. I know it was to be expected, but it is still difficult.

I think the feeling is a big part of healing it. Talking without feeling accomplishes something, but starting to feel as well is another level.

I was a bit shocked to actually have feelings about it. Hopefully it will be helpful and this will be the first step in actually feeling better. Otherwise it will be a lot of uncomfortable stuff for nothing.

I think that comes under the category of "that's his problem".

LOL. I could tell he was a little thrown by my comment. I am a very nice, soft spoken, and kind person. I rarely lash out at anyone, and never had at him. He said it was ok and that he can take it. I will try harder to keep it under control in the future though.

 

[Hashi]

I rarely lash out at anyone, and never had at him. He said it was ok and that he can take it. I will try harder to keep it under control in the future though.

I wouldn't. Seriously. My therapist has actually said to me that if I've been talking about something tough in therapy then it's for her to manage things, not me. I'm not expected to be rational or reasonable at all.

Maybe it's time you lashed out a little, and therapy is a safe place to do that?

 

[AngelKeeperJ]

Just a note about the 'layers' of our traumatic pain. I don't remember when I discovered the 'onion analogy' that helps me understand the layers that we have to face. Anger, sadness, fear...over and over again.

Our healing is like peeling away the layers of an onion. You peel one layer away, then there is another, then another. Finally, when you've finished that 'onion' or issue, along comes another onion or issue. No trauma or therapy is one-layered. Especially for those of use who never have had a 'normal' life. (Whatever that is)

In my case, I think I've gone through many onion crops. But, I have gotten better at recognizing if it is old or new issues that are affecting me. That helps a lot. For so long, my feelings were always jumbled and it was hard to tell which one was causing the most anxiety. Time and patience, whether I liked it or not, has helped the most.

I was not able to get angry for a very long time. It was too scary, and it felt like it would overtake the 'real' me, so I buried it to the point of not being 'real'. Now, I better control my scary feelings, and it feels good.

I hope this helps...I feel like I'm rambling. I just want to encourage you, and cheer you on in your battle for healing. I think all kinds of therapy have their place, and can be used alternately, or when new things come up. The main thing is not giving up, and I know you aren't doing that!

:hug: