It's very weird what people think of you. As someone who's had anxiety and panic attacks for well over a year, I havent reached out to anyone or said anything. People see me as happy as I always make jokes and try my best to make people smile.
Recently, the discussion of anxiety and depression cane up, and I started to churn. I wanted to say something to my friends, but they'd think so different of me. They turned to me and said you're definitely the happiest here. You'd never have anxiety.
Honest, i just laughed it off. I didn't know what to say. I wasnt going to say well actually at night I have panic attacks of childhood sexual abuse from age 7 and 10 where I just start crying for hours, but for you guys don't worry I'll drop as many jokes as i can. But it made me realise what it was really like to be putting on a front for people. We're mean and rude to people often but we don't know whats going on when they're not with us. Just a thought.
Recently, the discussion of anxiety and depression cane up, and I started to churn. I wanted to say something to my friends, but they'd think so different of me. They turned to me and said you're definitely the happiest here. You'd never have anxiety.
Honest, i just laughed it off. I didn't know what to say. I wasnt going to say well actually at night I have panic attacks of childhood sexual abuse from age 7 and 10 where I just start crying for hours, but for you guys don't worry I'll drop as many jokes as i can. But it made me realise what it was really like to be putting on a front for people. We're mean and rude to people often but we don't know whats going on when they're not with us. Just a thought.
