Personalities Due To Trauma

[Lionheart]

I was diagnosed with fragmented personality disorder, can anyone tell me what this means exactly. I think It means I began to split off into different personalities, but I am not really sure. I can get my "T" to explain it, but I was hoping to connect with others who have been given this same diagnosis.. I wonder if it falls under the heading of a DID.

 

[scott_1971_h]

I was diagnosed with fragmented personality disorder, can anyone tell me what this means exactly. I think It means I began to split off into different personalities, but I am not really sure. I can get my "T" to explain it, but I was hoping to connect with others who have been given this same diagnosis.. I wonder if it falls under the heading of a DID.

It means that some part of your personality "splintered off" from your awareness, thereby letting you survive when you may very well not have. Very good at the time (ie you did survive), but not so good now when you need all those bits of you together.
Scott

 

[mohsen]

I was diagnosed with fragmented personality disorder, can anyone tell me what this means exactly. I think It means I began to split off into different personalities, but I am not really sure. I can get my "T" to explain it, but I was hoping to connect with others who have been given this same diagnosis.. I wonder if it falls under the heading of a DID.

Maybe. but it also could be MPD( MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER) .Fragmented personality in some way reminds me of ALTER-PERSONALITIES and as Scott mentioned ,A Mental Entity(A neutral term for any psychic entity which takes control of the body from the Emotional Self or Essence. This term is meant to include both alter-personalities and all kinds of thoughtforms, such as imaginary playmates.) created by the ISH/Essence( A role needed for disaster control assumed by the Essence of a highly hypnotizable person who dissociates before the age of seven because of life-threatening trauma. ). The ISH/Essence creates them from personality characteristics available to the Original Personality and programs them to perform certain needed survival-oriented functions. Types include:

A- False-Fronts: These are designed for everyday social functioning and replace the absent Original Personality. These alter-personalities will not be able to process negative emotions such as anger. If the abuse continues, they will develop anger, which they cannot deal with, so the ISH/Essence must create a Persecutor alter-personality to manage the anger.

B. Persecutors: These alter-personalities are designed to accept, hold, process and express forbidden negative emotions. They commonly make themselves as clones of the abuser, using the defense mechanism of "identification with the aggressor." (If one is the abuser, then one cannot be killed by that abuser.) The Persecutors require most of the reconstructive therapy time, so that they can be neutralized and integrated with the Original Personality.

C. Helpers: When a Persecutor causes such social trouble that the patient is in danger, the balance of forces is maintained by the ISH creating a specific Helper alter-personality who is assigned deal with that Persecutor.

D. Handicapped: Some alter-personalities will be developed with "useful" handicaps, such as deafness to avoid hearing parents arguing.

E. Identifiers: Some alter-personalities will be developed by identification with other persons, such as playmates or caretakers.

 

[Lionheart]

Thank you for the replies, it makes perfect sense to me now.:)

 

[Kunoichi]

I have Dissociative Identity Disorder. This as being I have complete separate identities who "come out" have their own view of reality, their own tone inflection and my body actually has physical changes when a particular alter is out. I only know about the majority of them through notes they have written (with the more communicative ones) to conversations they have had with friends or family members.

I do believe in sub-personalities which I feel are completely different from MPD/DID. I didn't ask to be this way and if I could control it I would. It has improved a lot since I first became "aware". I still do not remember much of my past except what I've seen in flashbacks, seen written from them or what they have told me. I personally did not "come to dominance" until the body was 21 (which is my age) and its more than likely I'm the "original" personality before split off occurred.

There is a very good book that may help you (though if you are a Multiple, I highly recommend that you take care. I've had some bad situations arise when I pushed it too hard and lost memory for a few days. I came back to in a mental hospital and had to hear from staff and family what occurred.)

"Dissociative Identity Disorder Sourcebook" by Deborah Haddock. This is written by a Multiple and therapist. It explains what type of alters there are (though obviously not every type has to take place), what to seek in terms of integration and therapy help etc.

I'm not going to say whether you have it or not, just saying on my own experience what I've had to learn that it is. It's been a very hard 2, nearly 3 years, now dealing with this and having to work on it with at least 2 trips to MH hospital for help. In my opinion, therapist is important, but key really is getting Communication and Cooperation within the family structure to help create safe places. This may not mean you won't have the stigma but in the end of things, it doesn't matter. What matters is YOU know what is going on.

Frankly, I could care less about diagnosis' since I know what is going on for myself, and I know what I experience. If people don't believe me (which only my sister in my family has some semblance of belief but even she doesn't want to say "yes" since it is obviously rare and well family isn't supportive of me anyways.), than that is their problem. As Anthony said, it is extremely rare. I went through abuse from the age of 2/3 to 21. My sister went through severe abuse and she doesn't have it *shrugs* sometimes the mind just works that way. But I have had 2 psychiatrists and a psychologist confirm my diagnosis of DID so in that respect it's a non issue.

Anyways, I hope the book helps you. I have had to read it at times one page at a time, though I know most of my learning through my own experience since its such an internal process. I have had one alter integration (which was very odd) and since integration, I can recognize where that specific alter who is no longer one, has a part of the Whole Personality.

Sorry for making this a novel.

Thanks for reading

Kunoichi

 

[LaurenRose]

This is a fascinating thread. I have struggled to find language to be able to talk about who I am becoming. I have been diagnosed with DID which I disagree with and wish I could come up with a better descriptor that the professionals will understand. I have individuals inside of me who serve a variety of purposes such as "The Observer, The Recorder, The Planner, Recovery and The Warrior" to name a few. These individuals have their own voice, emotion, inflection and behaviour. There is obviously a "me" who is aware of their presence and has some sort of symbiotic relationship with them. I have something like a "control centre" that whoever is needed can step into and operate. The "me" that is talking right now is physically present in that room, sometimes active, sometimes passive. I was freaked out when I first became aware of what was going on inside of me. I looked back on my life and it explained how for all of my life I have felt separated, disconnected from my self and from the world. I see the patterns of individuality consistent with my awareness of how I am today. I am still a bit confused about why "integration" is so important. Wouldn't it be better to spend my energies on helping them find their groove and then work in harmony with each other rather than suffocating in fear?

 

[Nase]

I currently am becoming aware of these puzzle peices that have always been with me, but didn't know what to do with them. Of course I never talked to anyone about my suspicions; instead I put on my Donna Reed act and put on the show. Oddly I think that is one of my alters. I am anxiously awaiting my first appt. with a psych, and will share my suspicions. I just told my therapist (whom me and hubby both really like) about "Monster", and how I realize with some supportive friends that I should not fear "Monster". Once I realized these are not outside entities trying to harm me, but me trying to communicate...fear is dissolving. This thread has been quite encouraging, and motivating. Thank you to all the pioneers who didn't have a name for "it" or who didn't have the support to step out. If you guys hadn't had the courage; the rest of us wouldn't have known where to go.

 

[heidi]

This thread is freaking me out. I have a very hard time thinking I might not regain my personality. I sure relate to the volcano personality. Only it doesn't feel like me.. just forces acting on me. Still I've gained so many things I never used to have. Maybe the self is like an eco-system and that's why any change effects the whole thing. I don't know.. I just would one day like myself back.

 

[kimba]

Being dissociative and having "parts" that have held different trauma memories and emotions is one of the things I have really been struggling with over the last couple of months and one of the reasons I haven't been on as often as I was. I had a major trigger object come into my life which made my "cup" flow over. This was when one of my "parts" started being co-conscious and affected what I wanted to say and "she" wouldn't let me "physically" continue until i acknowledged her. I wrote about that when it first happened.

Then my dissociative states and and shutdowns became more frequent. I am still struggling with all of this and not finding it easy to just surrender myself to the process. To be honest, I have even contemplated suicide because I have had such a tough time accepting it all. I went into therapy with major depression and anxiety due to PTSD and becaue of this one particular trigger object (which showed up in the yard behind me and isn't something I can control), all hell broke loose. Sorry to ramble but this is something I thought "happened to other people" until it happened to me.

 

[Lionheart]

(((Kimba))))

 

[OKRADLAK]

I do not have DID, but I do have many different sides. Some are more scary than others. Some have different religious beliefs. But I have a firm grip on who the real me is, so there is no DID issues.

I guess that I know who I WANT to be and that keeps me grounded in "me".

So if I were to do something really bizarre like buy a Harley, I would know even whilst doing it that it was mania or something, which has happened several times.