Please Remind Me Why People With PTSD Should Not Drink

[Nicolette]

Interestingly, on the AA topic, after dealing with the aftermath of an abusive relationship it was recommended that I attend AA to use their 12 step program to aide my healing as the principles were supposedly so good.

I went to one meeting & had to stop myself from running out the door feeling like a total misfit. It was the biggest waste of my time considering I wasn't even drinking. Everyone sat around in a circle, talked about their weekly progress & while I went in with an open mind learned nothing to assist with trauma healing. Just MHO.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Yes, I understand what you mean Anthony. Didn't know you can't crave alcohol. Shit, I guess if my husband catch me I can't use that excuse.... It was never my intentaion to get drunk, that's not what I'm looking for. I've only got drunk ( really drunk) twice. But I've drank (numb) a lot more. I always am aware why you shouldn't get drunk, it just leaves room for stupidity.My husband is a different matter. We are both Muslim, and in Islam you shouldn't drink ( its a sin) and I know husband wont forgive me for drinking.He has never drank, never smoked, never anything ( resenting him for being so...damn righteous) ... Right now my feeling on it are completely---its between me and God kinda of thing---and I don't mean drinking a few nights a week either. I'm talking like once a week. Frankly, I'm not so religious as to think god wont forgive me for drinking. I'm hoping he will understand though, -----I could be doing so much worse. Don't worry I don't drink straight up. My fav. is vodka with whatever juice i have, rum and coke is good too. But vodka the best.

I'm starting to think of ways to sneak it into the house...I think I've figured it out too. I had this problem with cigarettes too. I got those into the house, after craving them for so long. That was 6 months ago, and I've only smoked two (2) cigarettes. But yeah I thought it might help with the whole alcohol thing- I saw it as the lesser of two evils. ...but didnt do shit. I wasn't expecting anything huge as its just a cigarette. Hookah is better in the tobacco range.

Sorry my post isn't well put together..., my husband is right in front of me. So I feel guilty for thinking about it , and at the same time don't care. then feel guilty for not really caring.

So I guess in the end I'm more like I'm torn between my husband feelings on it...and dealing with my own problems.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Interestingly, on the AA topic, after dealing with the aftermath of an abusive relationship it was recommended that I attend AA to use their 12 step program to aide my healing as the principles were supposedly so good.

I went to one meeting & had to stop myself from running out the door feeling like a total misfit. It was the biggest waste of my time considering I wasn't even drinking. Everyone sat around in a circle, talked about their weekly progress & while I went in with an open mind learned nothing to assist with trauma healing. Just MHO.

What made you go if you were drinking? How would that really help you?? But yeah could see how that doesn't help. Never been to AA but I imagine its not really the same for people who don't drink all the time. right? I don't want to sound stupid...guess i am.

 

[anthony]

If your sneaking anything, then that is wrong in so many ways. If you can't be honest with your husband, then sorry... your relationship is pretty much going to end-up in a bad place sooner or later.

 

[Nicolette]

What made you go if you were drinking? How would that really help you??

Hi Ayesha, I think you misread what I wrote. I wasn't drinking but was told by a counselor that the principles of AA would be helpful with dealing with ending up in abusive relationships.....as in breaking a cycle like alcoholics need to do.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

thanks Anthony, I should be more honest with him. I can totally see what you mean about the relationship, I don't deny there are problems. I've told him I've wanted a drink before. He says "astaghfirullah" which is arabic mean"I seek forgiveness from God", "will use this phrase often, even in conversation with another person. When a Muslim abstains from doing wrong, or even wishes to prove their innocence in an incident, they will use this expression" gotta love wiki



So yeah...Doesn't really help me . He is denying the problem.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Hi Ayesha, I think you misread what I wrote. I wasn't drinking but was told by a counselor that the principles of AA would be helpful with dealing with ending up in abusive relationships.....as in breaking a cycle like alcoholics need to do.

Opps I meant to write. "what made you go if you weren't drinking?" I can see kinda of about breaking a cycle...but its not the same cycle. You already said it wasn't helpful.

 

[Nicolette]

He is denying the problem.

IMHO you are the one with the problem and in denial as you are lying to both yourself and your husband about your drinking. His reaction is his reaction to the way you deal with your drinking; you admit to being dishonest with him. To me dishonesty is the bigger issue.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

IMHO you are the one with the problem and in denial as you are lying to both yourself and your husband about your drinking. .

I haven't drunk alcohol in two years. i haven't decided to start or tried. But I think about it all the time. He knows this.

Am I still being dishonest?

 

[Nicolette]

Shit, I guess if my husband catch me I can't use that excuse.... It was never my intentaion to get drunk, that's not what I'm looking for. I've only got drunk ( really drunk) twice. But I've drank (numb) a lot more.

I'm talking like once a week. Frankly, I'm not so religious as to think god wont forgive me for drinking. I'm hoping he will understand though, -----I could be doing so much worse. Don't worry I don't drink straight up. My fav. is vodka with whatever juice i have, rum and coke is good too. But vodka the best.

I'm starting to think of ways to sneak it into the house...I think I've figured it out too. I had this problem with cigarettes too. I got those into the house, after craving them for so long. That was 6 months ago, and I've only smoked two (2) cigarettes. But yeah I thought it might help with the whole alcohol thing- I saw it as the lesser of two evils.

I am bowing out of this conversation as I can't make sense of it sorry. One minute I am reading the above and then the next you are saying you haven't had a drink in two years. I am confused. All the best.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I'm sorry Nicolette, I don't mean to stress you out. forgive me. thanks for your input.

The drinking I am talk about is past tense. The rest is what i was thinking of doing, or want to do. I can see how it was confusing. But I haven't drank in two years I should also point out that I have been married for 1 year and 11 months! I started the post hoping to be told a bunch of reason to not *start* drinking again.

 

[amethist]

I will give you one good reason for not starting to drink again Ayesha.

"Your future"

I watched a wonderful man be dragged down by drink because of his PTSD issues, the drinking ended over 2 years ago because he knew he had a massive problem and was killing himself, he asked for help and got it, from the professionals. So from drinking 24/7 to nothing with help from a 10 day detox residential program, he is doing great without the drink.

Before he was excepted into the program, I knew he was drinking but he was hiding from me just how bad this had got, and this is my point. If you hide your drinking from your husband, and you spiral out of control, it could kill you, as it could have done to my husband. This is a distinct possibility if he ever started again.

There are many ways in which drink can cause irreparable damage and worse. If you would like to know the worse case scenario's then just ask, but the spirits are worse than any thing else.

Amethist