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Please Remind Me Why People With PTSD Should Not Drink

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On AA - I don't believe in it either. If your body/mind can handle drinking in moderation, then by all means, social drink. Each person has his/her own chemical makeup, history, lifestyle... that play into it.

On alcohol itself - it's literally a poison to the human body. Ask your liver about it.

On sneaking around - It doesn't matter if your hiding bites of chocolate or a mickey of rye in your sock draw, if you're hiding something, you gotta pull it out of the closet and confront it.

All this crap is hard work, but in the end, you'll be healthier for it.
 
Ayesha,

I may be reading this quite wrong, but these parts of your posts caught my attention:

I need some support to stay away from the alcohol.

We are both Muslim, and in Islam you shouldn't drink ( its a sin) and I know husband wont forgive me for drinking. He has never drank, never smoked, never anything ( resenting him for being so...damn righteous)

...like I'm torn between my husband feelings on it...and dealing with my own problems.

I've told him I've wanted a drink before. He says "astaghfirullah" which is arabic means "I seek forgiveness from God" ... So yeah...Doesn't really help me . He is denying the problem.
To me this sounds like your husband is telling you to "just pray" and believes (or hopes) that praying and faith will solve the problem for you. At the same time you sound like praying is not helping you (at all?), that you have strongly repetitive, if not constant thoughts about drinking, and need to talk about that with someone. Based on what you wrote, your husband does not sound like he would feel at ease enough to listen.

Is this one core of your problem - that your husband does not want to or cannot handle even talking about alcohol, because in Islam alcohol is a sin?

In my experience, if something is very strongly forbidden in one's environment or in one's own value/belief system, that can make the obsessive thoughts and/or fears ever so much stronger. For myself, the fact that alcohol can be discussed and even laughed at has helped a lot with my issues (at least two of the people who abused me were in the habit of reeking of spirits, and my father in law is an alcoholic, which has hurt my husband all through his childhood and youth).

Hope this helps, and if this is totally off the mark, I'm sorry.

Athena
 
Ayesha,

I don't mean to ignore the recent posts, but in the first stages of this thread you mentioned trying physical activity. I realize it sound simplistic, but it really does work. Not long ago something along these lines came up in a thread, and Anthony posted ( I think it was him ) why exactly working one's body is so helpful. In that thread we were discussing running, I think.

I just find that every little bit of information one can get one's head around tends to be helpful, and feeds into whatever methods of managing this thing each individual finds works best for them in the end. I'm too 'antsy' to meditate properly, for instance, and find that I can zone out and meditate while running.
 
On alcohol itself - it's literally a poison to the human body. Ask your liver about it.
Yep... found out on my last test result that one result was just outside of normal, which is usually an alcohol related reading, being my drinking during my 20's and early 30's in the military and then uncontrolled PTSD. I rarely drink nowadays... just the odd one here and there if out, or with Nicolette after a big day, otherwise, I steer clear for past damage and not wanting to do any more.
 
I am and used to be ( somethings I don't do as offen. I used to hike a lot, I can't now as my husband works and hes not a hiking person )a active person. I was thinking of trying some classes. Like kickboxing, I joined a gym too. i liked that, but I can't now. I am moving in 3 weeks, and the packing and getting ready for that is taking must of my time.

there was a park I used to walk in, but I'm to scared to go back there now.
 
I am moving in 3 weeks, and the packing and getting ready for that is taking must of my time.

Just a thought - and this is not an effort to minimize your trauma or explain away your fears and triggers - is it possible that the move raises your stress level just enough to make you feel really bad? Have you read the "PTSD Cup Explanation" article on this site's main page? Especially the picture in it explains volumes. Can you find ways to lessen other stresses while the move is in its acute stage?

I wish you a refreshing sleep tonight, for starters!

Athena
 
- is it possible that the move raises your stress level just enough to make you feel really bad? Have you read the "PTSD Cup Explanation" article on this site's main page? Especially the picture in it explains volumes. Can you find ways to lessen other stresses while the move is in its acute stage?

I wish you a refreshing sleep tonight, for starters!

Athena

I actually just woke up, its 4;00 in the afternoon here. So i wont sleep anytime soon. And I read the cup thing.

I know what you mean, I'm trying not to get to stressed out. Even more for my husband.
I am going to stop in the town where I grew up on the way to the new place, that is worrying me a lot. Thats where it all happened, and I was thinking of reporting my rapist while I was there.
I don't know how to lessen my stress. I love driving ( and we are driving there) but if I get angry while driving its to dangerous. But if I am calm and driving that helps my stress level go down. Music helps too.
Am I making any sense?
 
Update...

I though a lot about this today...and this is what I came to.

I know I am young, and I know I can act like an idiot. I am trying my best right now.

I chose not to drink ( damn, that hurts). I know drinking would be dishonest. It would hurt my marriage. It would cross to many lines. It would be; stupid, selfish, dishonest, unforgivable. My husband doesn't want me to, and I know I shouldn't for a number of reasons.

I wont lie and say that I don't want a drink. But I will say I chose not to drink. For the sake of my life, my sanity and for my marriage. It is not worth it.

I love my husband and even if he's having a hard time understanding me right now, I will try my best to help.
 
There's a list somewhere that should be easy to find of how stressful various life events are. It's not actually targeted for PTSD sufferers per se, and has a scale where one can see how 'much' by way of a 'value' your stress adds up to every year. I think a move is way at the top of the scale. With PTSD already in place as a factor, perhaps you're really just plain on overload at the moment.

You really do seem to be facing your stressors, resisting the whole drinking thing and trying awfully hard not to impact your husband with any manifestations of PTSD behaviour on your part. It's making you terribly uncomfortable but you're doing it. In the middle of feeling so exhausted with all this, perhaps you might also see that you seem to be making some really positive decisions. It's nice to give yourself a pat on the back for sticking to it, too.

Moving also includes way too much activity to need to go join a gym or get a treadmill, in my opinion. :) I did it 2 years ago and lost 15 pounds!
 
I really hate that alcohol is such a double edged sword. If I drink to relax I end up with even more anxiety and feeling worse. But that "ahhh" feeling I get when in the first hour somehow makes it seem worthwhile.
 
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