A
Anger
Someone very dear to me lied about mental health and that his was "worse" than my mental health issues because he couldn't function but thought I could despite me literally killing myself slowly trying to live up to expectations. This started a series of me living in hypervigilance, to the point of physical abuse out of anger due to fear of the lie or that he would fall back. I forced him to become like me and a workaholic. I never even considered ptsd for me until he brought it up and I researched it and realized that a lot of my feelings, intrusive thoughts, lack of control in my emotions and more made me realize that ptsd is very likely. It pisses me off that he was the one to get help when I struggled with this for almost a year and I just wish that someone would acknowledge my issues because now my anxiety is so much worse, I have trouble enjoying things I enjoyed and oftentimes am on edge. I really love this person, I just can't seem to get over the lie or the fear that I will lash out again.