PTSD and Imagination

[Eliza]

Hello.

I was wondering if any of you guys have noticed changes in your imagination since your traumas? I hadn’t really noticed until recently, except that I lost interest in reading (I used to be an avid reader). But I thought that was down to feeling low. But I read an article about visualisation and memories a few days back, and I tried to do the exercise it suggested – visualise an apple. And I couldn’t for the life of me conjure the image in my head. I used to be able to completely engross myself in books, and draw up images of complex worlds just from words, but I’ve realised that now I can’t even visualise something as simple as an apple. I also used to listen to audio books with my eyes closed and be able to draw up the images in my head. But now I can’t even do that with books I’ve read (or listened to) over and over. I’ve been relistening to the Harry Potter audio books as I go to sleep, and I can’t visualise any of the characters or settings.

I can draw up images of the trauma in a heartbeat, but other than that, if I close my eyes it’s just plain black.

Has anybody else experienced this? Is it something to do with the way memories and processing is changed after trauma? And if so, is it something that ever comes back?

 

[Eagle3]

I would love to know this too, as I've NEVER been able to visualize on demand. I see images sometimes (autistic brain), but when asked to visualize something specific, can't do it. Never really could. Drives my T nuts, since his methodology is based on meditation techniques. I'm working on this, hoping to be able to visualize in the future, but I know when I'm highly symptomatic I can't visualize for sh*t.

 

[Ronin]

The opposite, here.

I overpic situations that usually go better than expected.

And avoid a lot of fiction & nonfic alike to not go real trauma land. Unless I'm working on exposure with something I'm too ashamed or guilty or other stuff to bring up in therapy and need an outlet.

Coped that way all time I had time to read & bad or none therapy.

 

[Tinyflame]

Yes same as @Eliza , but funny, probably could pull up traumas. FB's do. I can't remember if it was always like that.

 

[Eliza]

Drives my T nuts, since his methodology is based on meditation techniques.

It was during one of the meditation techniques that my T was using that I started noticing. I didn’t really think anything of it at the time, but hard as I tried, I couldn’t visualise what he was asking me to. I just kind of thought it out in words/abstract concepts in the end, as I didn’t want to admit that I couldn’t drum up a fairly basis visualisation of a place I’d been before.