Hmm....
1. What do you do to understand your partner with PTSD?
2. Why do you do what you do to understand your partner with PTSD?
Well, Me and my guy have a very strange back and forth. So my answers will be different than many others.
1. I have a mood disorder. My mood disorder helped trigger his PTSD and his PTSD helped to trigger my moods...and round and round we went. No boundaries, constant disrespect from both of us and just a real lack of anything worthwhile. Once I got diagnosed and he got diagnosed, I saw that we COULD have a real relationship but we had to address our own issues. Plus, he was so out of control that for my own sanity and mental health I had to leave. So I stopped all communication with him for 9-10 months.
I got myself healthy. I reached out to apologize for my role and he was receptive. While I worked on myself I learned all I could about the disease. I joined this forum. I talked to my therapist about how my disorder and his disorder could co-exist...if we chose that route.
He hasn't been treated as he is currently back overseas. He's open to counseling when he comes back and when he's home he's better...however, in combat zones he's a donkey...pure and simple.
Which leads to you next question...
2. I could give you the fairytale "because I love him" answer but I was never one for fantasy. I do it because I made the commitment to. I do it because in him I see my father, who also has PTSD. I do it because at the end of the day, he's a good person. I do it because he stood by me when I threw things at him...raged at him...belittled him...and more. I do it because I'm better now and he deserves the best I can be since he's already put up with the worst of me.
We are unconventional, but it's cool. Knowing what I know about PTSD is just the beginning. Knowing how it affects my guy is my challenge at this point. It's hard because he's away and not being treated. He's committed to treatment when he gets back because he's seen the remarkable changes treatment has made for me.
We're taking a break now...which is typical. He can only handle so much stress without resorting to complete attack mode (not physically) and I'm just to damn calm now to fight that battle. I don't go anyway...I'm always there for him. I just know when to say when...and when it's cool, we go back and continue building. Brick by brick...until we finish our solid masterpiece (corny!) Lol.
1. What do you do to understand your partner with PTSD?
2. Why do you do what you do to understand your partner with PTSD?
Well, Me and my guy have a very strange back and forth. So my answers will be different than many others.
1. I have a mood disorder. My mood disorder helped trigger his PTSD and his PTSD helped to trigger my moods...and round and round we went. No boundaries, constant disrespect from both of us and just a real lack of anything worthwhile. Once I got diagnosed and he got diagnosed, I saw that we COULD have a real relationship but we had to address our own issues. Plus, he was so out of control that for my own sanity and mental health I had to leave. So I stopped all communication with him for 9-10 months.
I got myself healthy. I reached out to apologize for my role and he was receptive. While I worked on myself I learned all I could about the disease. I joined this forum. I talked to my therapist about how my disorder and his disorder could co-exist...if we chose that route.
He hasn't been treated as he is currently back overseas. He's open to counseling when he comes back and when he's home he's better...however, in combat zones he's a donkey...pure and simple.
Which leads to you next question...
2. I could give you the fairytale "because I love him" answer but I was never one for fantasy. I do it because I made the commitment to. I do it because in him I see my father, who also has PTSD. I do it because at the end of the day, he's a good person. I do it because he stood by me when I threw things at him...raged at him...belittled him...and more. I do it because I'm better now and he deserves the best I can be since he's already put up with the worst of me.
We are unconventional, but it's cool. Knowing what I know about PTSD is just the beginning. Knowing how it affects my guy is my challenge at this point. It's hard because he's away and not being treated. He's committed to treatment when he gets back because he's seen the remarkable changes treatment has made for me.
We're taking a break now...which is typical. He can only handle so much stress without resorting to complete attack mode (not physically) and I'm just to damn calm now to fight that battle. I don't go anyway...I'm always there for him. I just know when to say when...and when it's cool, we go back and continue building. Brick by brick...until we finish our solid masterpiece (corny!) Lol.
