Sexual Assault Rape Stereotypes

[Deleted member 33052]

Sorry, Sam. Not trying to annoy you.

 

[8888]

I agree. ALink Removed makes good points too.

 

[LostGentleman]

What I think I'm hearing is that you feel your experience isn't reflected enough for you to have a place for it

The look of disbelief, and hearing "Cmon, that's impossible! How can a guy get raped by a woman? It wouldn't work unless he wants it!" - or getting a "lucky you, I'm still a virgin"
Sadly, it's very common. Hearing those. Even when we don't disclose what happened, and take it to the grave: because people still make remarks and release numerous exclamations when the topic is launched, someone mentions a female raping a male, or there are news on tv or an article on it
That's how I ended up explaining how biology is, to my closer friends.
That kind of disbelief, and of invalidation over something that took place, it hurts

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Even when they get that growth spurt, muscle mass still takes more time to build. I can EASILY see a guy in this age range being overpowered by a girl. Yes, easily.

Indeed.. Plus the confusion, can really overthrow us. For example, a grown man... :

Maybe the trouble is that it's difficult to imagine the scenario you mentioned, "a guy in a bedroom being overpowered by a girl," since most women are weaker than most men by nature. For instance, I can't imagine being able to overpower any man I know.

A grown man who has conscience of his power, may find it extremely difficult psychologically, to lay his hands on a female, even if "just to hold her down". In all (my) occasions, the female was not silly, and knew how to position herself. If on top of the male, know we don't foresee the future. The assumption, is that the person will hear our No, and stop. Panic starts when we notice it isn't happening - yet a voice in my head kept saying that she HAD to hear it, to respect it, I'm respected as a person, as a human, right??? We assume it's just a joke, gone too far, like when one of the guys gets a bit too much enthusiasm with a mock wrestling moment. Then it's too late. Things are happening. On my personal experience, women don't take a hammer and while roaring with foam spurting from their gaping mouths, jump on the male aiming for their underwear, while screeching "I will force you!!!!!". They tend to giggle, tickle, fool around, act relaxed, or aroused - not menacing at all. And not really spelling "abuse is on the way". This, being one of the many cases where it is perpetrated by someone we know. Even by our partner. By the time we realize,.. to actually fight back, means fight back, and not all will be alright with that. I couldn't make the person fly over me, like I know from martial arts, due to fear of her hitting her head. And it crossed my mind.
Another thing: (as far as I know) We guys don't really expect rape to happen to us. For women to want us like so, in such a way that they will force it. We are usually not expecting it.
Us knowing the concept that females are usually weaker physically, if the man is a good man, means he will be likely to have issues on putting his strength against her. Even if to defend himself. And yes, holding the hands, works. For a bit. Little did I know on how those ladies could turn into octopuses. Eventually I lost. I thought it wouldn't be that easy. And I guess all who went through such hell, regardless of gender, thought the same

- I am aware you did not say that it is hard to have a female rape a male, and that you were referring to how hard it is for most of the population to imagine such scenario. It just met the same topic, and I added some information to it. Technique supplants cheer force, and the mental confusion (and denial) over what is taking place, play a huge part on male rape.

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It's bad enough by itself, but then facing stigma and disbelief makes it worse.

Yes.. Yes, a thousand times yes. And that is annihilating
Thank you for writing that, really